Some people believe that studying History is very important. Others say that it is irrelevant and has many limitations and should not be studied at all. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #history #limitations

there is

denying

Rephrase

no denying

show examples

the fact that studying

History

is very important

Correct your spelling

While

while

it is a commonly held belief that the

important

Replace the word

importance

show examples

of studying

History

, there is

also

argument

Add an article

the argument

an argument

show examples

that opposes it, in my opinion , I consider that studying

history

has significant features . On the one hand, studying

History

can expose individuals and society to the old eras.

in other words

, they can get lessons from

history

and experience and enrich their minds.

In addition

, you can escape their mistakes .

For example

, when reading your

History

you see weaknesses and strong points in your origin.

On the other

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

studying

history

increases

nation's

Correct article usage

a nation's

show examples

identity and robust the person's feeling of belonging to his roots.it is

also

possible to say that by reading

history

you can go deep into your culture and the traditional life in your family ,

Moreover

, you can compare old and new things together.

For instance

, stay life in a modern era or hairstyle. In conclusion, there are no essay

answers

Correct pronoun usage

that answers

show examples

this

question .On balance

however

I tend to believe that Studying

history

offers significant advantages in terms of exposure to true lessons from life ,it is important to escape copying

history

and apply nowadays, rather the cancel

this

History

Subject from studying which can hide many things

Submitted by rami_agha77 on Sun Sep 08 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your essay needs to be divided into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or argument.

task achievement

Make sure your arguments are well-developed and supported with specific examples. This helps in making your points clearer and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Work on your grammatical accuracy and the variety of sentence structures. There are a few errors in your essay that affect readability. For instance, 'important' should be 'importance' and 'it is also argument' should be 'there is also an argument'.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction sets up the discussion well by mentioning both sides of the argument and giving your opinion.

supported main points

You have tried to provide examples to support your points, which is a good practice to develop a more convincing argument.

introduction conclusion present

Your conclusion attempts to balance the arguments and provides a final stance on the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

210 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that studying History is very important. Others say that it is irrelevant and has many limitations and should not be studied at all. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.

Learning English is important? Do you agree or disagree?

the dat shows that the chages of a park from 1990 to pressnt day . summarise the information and reporting the main features and make comparisons

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.