Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities.
It is thought by some that their happiest years were during their teenage years. Others,
however
, believe that happiness comes during adult life later on, despite a great deal of responsibilities. Linking Words
Although
being an adult means having enough Linking Words
money
to enjoy many life activities, Use synonyms
teenagers
have an enormous amount of Use synonyms
time
to spend on leisure activities, and Use synonyms
for
Linking Words
this
reason, I stand with the latter view.
Undoubtedly, adults usually have the Linking Words
money
to spend on entertaining activities and creating joyful moments. Use synonyms
Due to
the fact that adults usually have the financial means to travel somewhere far, attend a concert, or even rent an expensive car, many express their happiest moments to be during their thirties and the years after Linking Words
while
their health is still perfect and they have enough Linking Words
money
to spend. Use synonyms
For example
, a 35-year-old man can always travel to Spain during summertime and be able to create unforgettable Linking Words
momentsmoments
. Correct your spelling
moments moments
However
, in my opinion, most adults are so engaged mentally with work and family responsibilities that they do not have the Linking Words
time
to spend or travel but rarely.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, during adolescence, Linking Words
teenagers
have all the Use synonyms
time
they need to have fun. Having no serious tasks or long working hours, Use synonyms
teenagers
often spend their Use synonyms
time
partying with their cool friends throughout the week Use synonyms
while
having absolutely no responsibility on their shoulders. Linking Words
As a result
, people usually remember these days as their happiest. Linking Words
For example
, Linking Words
teenagers
usually have their own party places that open during weekdays, especially when they become university students, they become happier as their social network Use synonyms
also
expands. Personally, I believe that having no responsibilities is the key to creating happy moments to remember.
Linking Words
To conclude
, Linking Words
while
being an adult means having more Linking Words
money
to spend on entertaining events, Use synonyms
teenagers
have all the Use synonyms
time
in the world to be with their friends and party, and that, in my view, is the reason why people remember these days as their happiest.Use synonyms
Submitted by ghorabibita on
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task achievement
While the essay addresses the topic effectively, try to diversify your vocabulary to avoid repetition. For example, phrases like 'momentsmoments' seem repetitive and should be rectified.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While the overall structure is good, connecting sentences between paragraphs more clearly can improve cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly presents the topic and your stance on it, which makes it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
relevant specific examples
The usage of specific examples such as the 35-year-old man traveling to Spain and teenagers enjoying parties enhances the relevance and engagement of your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?