Some people think that sport is very important for society. Others, however, argue that it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.(重复2011 年老题)
These days,
sports
have become essential in our community, Use synonyms
while
many people Linking Words
also
think it is nothing more vital than recreational activities. Linking Words
While
exercising consumes a lot of time and money, I believe that Linking Words
sport
still positively impacts our lives.
One significant thing to consider is that Use synonyms
sport
is a unifier that can bring people from different ages and ethnicities to do exercises together. Use synonyms
In other words
, Linking Words
sports
promote teamwork and bring social divides. Use synonyms
That is
to say, these are a perfect way to unify a country that has many different cultures and tribes. Linking Words
For example
, the Indonesia National Football Team contains players from almost all provinces that have different skin colours and languages but can develop great unity Linking Words
while
playing football. Linking Words
However
, Linking Words
sports
can become one of the activities that will have a meaningful impact on society.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, it cannot be denied that the role of Linking Words
sport
is a hobby or recreation because Use synonyms
sport
will release stress hormones from the body and bring happiness. Use synonyms
Moreover
, the community usually choose to do a workout that they love or mastered, and it can be a single not partnership Linking Words
sport
. Use synonyms
For example
, introverted person choose to do Yoga alone in their apartment rather than playing badminton with their friends. Linking Words
Consequently
, not all humans have the ability to do unity Linking Words
sports
, so not all Use synonyms
sports
are overemphasized in society.
In conclusion, whether doing Use synonyms
sport
is for social activity or recreation, it does not reduce the benefits of Use synonyms
sport
for our healthiness. I think that someone should choose what kind of Use synonyms
sport
they will do, so it still has an effective effect on personal or community.Use synonyms
Submitted by dewintaputri23 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Develop your ideas more fully. For both views, ensure you expand on the impacts or reasons why people may hold these beliefs about sport, providing more breadth and depth to your argument.
task achievement
Work on providing clearer topic sentences that guide the reader to the main idea of each paragraph. Make sure each topic sentence directly relates to the task at hand.
coherence and cohesion
Introduce more cohesive devices to improve the flow of your essay. While you've used some linking words, additional transitions and linking phrases could strengthen the connections between ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Try to ensure a clear progression of ideas throughout the paragraphs, without abrupt shifts or loosely connected points. This would enhance logical structure.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion encapsulate your main arguments clearly and concisely, with the conclusion summarizing your personal stance effectively.