IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

The increasing prevalence of convenience food will lead to traditional methods of cooking disappearing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#prevalence #convenience #food #methods
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that conventional modes of food preparation will disappear with the rise of pre-prepared meal boxes.
This
Linking Words
 essay completely disagrees with the statement because it is costly to keep consuming
this
Linking Words
 kind of eatables and the fact that they are extremely unhealthy. Readymade dishes come with a cost to consumers. Companies that provide these types of services levy different kinds of charges to serve their customers. There are preparation costs, service tax and handling fees. If ordered online, they even add delivery charges and platform fees. By the time it is served, the total price of the dish would be almost twice the actual amount.
For example
Linking Words
, Zomato marks up the prices of their items by applying restaurant tariffs, 10% delivery charges of the base amount, duties and INR 5 platform fees. In the end, the price is more than 100 times the original, even after discounts.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 kind of services normally cook their food early and store it in dark cold storage for preservation.
This
Linking Words
 in turn makes it old and rotten.
Instead
Linking Words
 of consuming freshly cooked food, people have these, resulting in ill health.
Further
Linking Words
, they are not cooked with proper proportions of ingredients which are suitable for digestion. Often, these would be extremely oily, and spicy and have plenty of sugar.
As a result
Linking Words
, there is almost no nutritional value left in the end.
For instance
Linking Words
,the consumption of packaged meat in Western countries like the USA, the UK and Canada has resulted in a significant spike in Cancer. In conclusion, ordering online edibles is a costly affair and if consumed regularly, poses a significant threat to the health of people.
Hence
Linking Words
, the idea that it will replace the orthodox style is flawed.
Submitted by majumdarnilesh21 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is tightly focused on a single main idea to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider variety of cohesive devices to improve the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
Consider expanding on specific examples and providing more detailed evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and specific introduction and conclusion which helps frame the essay nicely.
task achievement
Your main points are well-organized and relevant to the topic, addressing the prompt effectively.
task achievement
You provide specific examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: