Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.   Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It
Correct pronoun usage
There
show examples
is a considerable debate about which factor will provide more benefits for people in daily
life
,
competition
or
cooperation
.
However
, from my perspective,
competition
is the best choice for the individual and society.
To begin
with,
cooperation
brings a series of advantages for people in daily
life
. Nowadays, most
work
in companies and schools is teamwork, which means individuals should cooperate with each other to deal with difficulties in
work
and study. Because individual power and capacity are limited,
cooperation
with others can improve efficiency in
work
and the ability to get over difficulties to some extent.
For instance
, at
work
, the
cooperation
between architects and civil engineers can adapt the design on time to fit in demands of consumers through the
constructing
Replace the word
construction
show examples
process and improve sales figures.
However
,
cooperation
will lead to a lot of drawbacks
such
as conflict with teammates, deficiency of innovation and motivation, etc.
It is clear that
competition
not only improves efficiency at
work
and study but
also
stimulates people to try their best to strive for excellence. On the one hand, commercial
competition
can drive companies to launch better goods to satisfy customers’ desires, which will bring convenience to daily
life
and enhance people’s quality of
life
.
On the other hand
, educational
competition
will make students study hard to obtain good grades in examinations and encourage researchers in universities to explore new technological fields constantly.
Therefore
,
competition
can boost individual progress and maintain the social dynamic and creativity. In conclusion,
competition
is the main power to motivate
progress
Add an article
the progress
show examples
of the individual and society in every new field
instead
of
cooperation
.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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task achievement
Ensure each main point is thoroughly explained and supported with relevant, detailed examples. This will enhance the comprehensiveness of your ideas.
task achievement
Avoid sweeping statements such as 'competition is the main power'. Instead, provide balanced arguments or moderate your claim to maintain critical analysis.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transitions between paragraphs for smoother flow by using linking phrases or sentences.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and consistent focus. Avoid introducing multiple points too quickly within a single paragraph.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which adequately frame the discussion.
task achievement
The main points are relevant to the topic and support the discussion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
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