Some people believe that no one should be allowed to continue working after the age of 65. However, others say there shouldn’t be a limitation on age, and anyone should be allowed to work regardless of their age. Discuss both views, give your opinion and include relevant examples.

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There is no denying the fact that opinions differ regarding whether
people
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should be allowed to
work
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beyond the
age
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of 65.
While
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some argue that there should be no
age
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limit for working, others believe that continuing to
work
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after 65 should not be permitted.
This
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essay will discuss both perspectives and provide my opinion on the matter.
To begin
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with, proponents of allowing
people
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to
work
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after the
age
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of 65 argue that it benefits countries with
aging
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ageing
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populations.
For example
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, in advanced countries like Japan, many
people
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continue to
work
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beyond 65, contributing to the economy and filling gaps in the workforce.
Additionally
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, individuals who choose to
work
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past retirement
age
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often have the flexibility to balance
work
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with leisure, spending quality time with their families. In rural communities, it is common for
people
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to engage in agricultural activities throughout their lives, demonstrating that
work
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can be a lifelong pursuit.
On the other hand
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, those who support
age
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limitations for working argue that it can foster social interaction and provide opportunities for younger generations. Mandatory retirement can encourage older individuals to engage in community activities and spend more time with their families, enhancing their quality of life.
Furthermore
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, it opens up job opportunities for younger
people
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, helping to reduce unemployment rates and bring fresh perspectives into the workforce. In conclusion,
while
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working beyond the
age
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of 65 has its challenges, the benefits often outweigh the limitations. Rather than making
work
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after 65 mandatory, it should be an option available to those who wish to continue contributing to society. By allowing individuals to choose, we can respect their autonomy and acknowledge the valuable experience they bring to the workforce.
Submitted by rami_agha77 on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a strong and comprehensive response to the task. However, you can strengthen your argument by including more detailed examples and further discussing potential counterarguments for each perspective.
coherence cohesion
To improve the coherence of your essay, consider using more varied transition words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. Additionally, some paragraphs could be better organized to ensure a more logical flow of ideas.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your points while providing a clear opinion.
supported main points
Main points are well-supported with relevant examples, particularly the reference to Japan's aging population and agricultural activities in rural communities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory retirement age
  • age discrimination
  • work-life balance
  • economic stability
  • pension plans
  • life expectancy
  • older workforce
  • job market dynamics
  • intergenerational workplace
  • financial pressure
  • mentorship
  • productivity
  • new technologies
  • physical or mental decline
  • personal freedom
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