The graph below Shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graph below Shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The data shows

Correct article usage

the

show examples

amount of

shops

Use synonyms

that have been opened and closed in the same country from 2011 and 2018.

Overall

Linking Words

, the main figure of the graph is that there are often more

shops

Use synonyms

closed than new ones that came out. And the trend of

shops

Use synonyms

going slowly downward in comparison with 2011 and 2018.

Firstly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

was a massive number of new openers in 2011, which is

eighty five

Add a hyphen

eighty-five

show examples

hundred;

however

Linking Words

, in that year, there were

also

Linking Words

big numbers of closed

shops

Use synonyms

, which contained about 6300. But in the next year, the number of new stores decreased by more than twice,

while

Linking Words

the downtrend of closing ones was

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

minor. From the graph, we can notice that in 2015 there was an unnormally small amount of shut-down stores, which is only 500, but in the next three

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

this

Linking Words

number became more habitual, about 5000.

Further

Linking Words

, there was a smooth decline

for open

Change preposition

in opening

show examples

new

shops

Use synonyms

from 2014 to 2018.

dnm.bestTue Sep 10 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words shops with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

161 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

trend
fluctuation
peak
decline
surge
stabilize
correlation
economic conditions
consumer behavior
technological advancements
urban development
employment
retail sector

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Recently bought a piece of sports equipment from an online store. When you first used the piece of sports equipment you found a problem with it. Write a letter to the manager of the online store. In your letter Describe the problem with the piece of sports equipment Siri what happened because of the problem Explain what you would like the company to do
I would like to inform you that I recently purchased a piece of equipment online but it is not fit for the sports bicycle.
7
band
In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
In our modern world, the choices made by young people in relation to beginning a career are changing with many university-age people opting to undertake training in the workplace. While this has numerous benefits for both society and the young, some drawbacks can also be observed.
4.5
band
Some people believe that humans are damaging seriously the environment. What are the causes? What should people do to solve this problem?
Perhaps, there is no topic of controversy in this contemporary society worth debating as the matter of that the people are damaging seriously the evironment. Indeed, people's views differ greatly as to whether humans have a nagative impact on the nature. To inhand living quality, the People are destroyting progressively the habital, ecosystem, biodiversity resulting in environmental degracation. To the best of my knowledge, various factors are claimed to be the cause, yet, could be tackled by plausible solutions.
6
band
The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly. What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media?
The increasing usage of social media platforms helped civilians to release their pent-up frustrations and complaints to the world. This essay will discuss the aftermath of this trend by exaggerating the information as well as swaying the readers to commit wrong acts. I do believe that this activity has some benefits such as freedom on the internet and the best method to persuade others.
5
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people say that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.
It is often considered that a few individuals reckon that advertising is extremely successful at persuading the public to purchage items. Whereas, many believe that publishing is normal that they no longer interested to pay attention on it. In my, an inclined that advertisement is successful to influence the masses to buy things. Thus, this essay will elaborate on both notions which further leads to a logical conclusion.

The graph below Shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that humans are damaging seriously the environment. What are the causes? What should people do to solve this problem?

The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly. What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people say that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.