The graph below Shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

The graph below Shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
The data shows
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
amount of
shops
that have been opened and closed in the same country from 2011 and 2018.   
Overall
, the main figure of the graph is that there are often more
shops
closed than new ones that came out. And the trend of
shops
going slowly downward in comparison with 2011 and 2018.  
Firstly
,
this
was a massive number of new openers in 2011, which is
eighty five
Add a hyphen
eighty-five
show examples
hundred;
however
, in that year, there were
also
big numbers of closed
shops
, which contained about 6300. But in the next year, the number of new stores decreased by more than twice,
while
the downtrend of closing ones was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
minor.   From the graph, we can notice that in 2015 there was an unnormally small amount of shut-down stores, which is only 500, but in the next three
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
this
number became more habitual, about 5000.
Further
, there was a smooth decline
for open
Change preposition
in opening
show examples
new
shops
from 2014 to 2018.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words shops with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • decline
  • surge
  • stabilize
  • correlation
  • economic conditions
  • consumer behavior
  • technological advancements
  • urban development
  • employment
  • retail sector
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