Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they di their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another county if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many professionals in the whole world are not satisfied with their salaries and
situation
Correct article usage
the situation
show examples
in their countries. So they see the answer to
this
issue to work in another country, and we have several opinions about that. The first
one
is that doctors and engineers have to get jobs in their area, and the second
one
is that they can be free with their choice. Personally, I wish to choose the second
one
. On the
one
hand, there are individuals who reassure that others must work where they have trained. Of course,
this
is quite well assured
due to
the university having taught the professionals and logically wanting the best for their own medicine, etc.
For example
, in Kazakhstan, there are many contracts and options to pass to universities.
Such
as the scholarship of the mayor, in which we can decrease the amount of the requirement score.
However
, there is a small problem: we must be in the city of the college and work there for 3 years if our choice is medical. Because of that, many workers can lose their potential if there is no variety.
On the other hand
, workers are free to preferences and their wishes. Many humans in the world support
this
idea. Because I want to become a doctor in the future and
also
I do not prefer to be in an area where I can not be the best and can not develop at maximum. I will know that I can help people in other places but I can't go where I wish and I will know that I can earn more money in another place. In conclusion, I would say that each human has the right things
what
Correct word choice
that
show examples
he desires to do.
Submitted by bizhanalikhan6 on

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task achievement
Your essay introduces both viewpoints clearly. However, it lacks depth in the analysis of the arguments. Try to provide more detailed reasons and examples for both sides of the debate.
coherence cohesion
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrases. Reviewing basic grammar rules and sentence structures can help improve the clarity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a solid structure for your argument.
task achievement
You have expressed your personal opinion clearly, which is important in this type of essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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