In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development
In
this
day and age, an increasing number of people
are migration
towards the urban areas and leaving their rural lives behind, some argue that it would bring prosperity and development to the Urban population, Replace the word
migrating
however
, I personally believe that it will impose negative effects to the rural community leading to its decline.
To begin
with, Rural migration
isn't a new phenomenon, since the start of the Industrial Revolution and the evolution of technology, many people
abandoned the
rural life in order to seek living in Correct article usage
apply
the
more civilized and advanced Urban cities, Correct article usage
apply
this
trend caused a massive shortage in many sectors like farming ultimately leading to less crop production which worsens the food availability to an ever growing
population.
Aside from that, massive Add a hyphen
ever-growing
migration
to Urban areas has caused massive congestion among the city residents , massive overcrowding caused people
to be counterproductive, less
errands being done Change the quantifier
fewer
due to
difficulty in commuting between different places, placing further
burden on their stress levels that's why a huge sum of Add an article
a further
people
reported to have a lower quality of life than ever before. In addition
, this
overcrowding has brought with it increased levels of air pollution which consequently
affecting
their Wrong verb form
affects
overall
health by putting them at risk for contracting several terminal diseases like lung disease and cancer thus
causing a higher mortality rate.
To conclude
, I truly believe that rural migration
is negative
trend, not only it Add an article
a negative
causes
mass overcrowding and environmental pollution, Wrong verb form
cause
it
Correct word choice
but it
also
exerts further
pressure on the population's overall
health safety.Submitted by mohamedalassar2002 on
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relevant specific examples
Try to provide more specific examples that support your main points. For instance, you could mention specific countries or situations where rural migration has led to certain outcomes.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows logically from one to the next. Consider using transitional phrases to improve the coherence.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on expanding and clarifying your ideas. Some points could benefit from further explanation to fully develop your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the argument nicely.
supported main points
The main points are relevant to the topic and support the overall argument of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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