Some people believe that there should be a fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivating of committing it should always be taken account when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion

Every
crime
must have a penalty. Some people argue regarding the
punishment
for a
crime
. Should circumstances in which the
crime
has taken place be considered or fixed
punishment
be given for each
crime
In my opinion, the situation should be considered before taking any decision. One perspective says that applying fixed penalties is a good method as laws have been created for the
crime
the culprit has committed. It will help us in developing fear in every citizen not to repeat similar kinds of
crime
and society will be more safe.
For example
, In 2012 a girl was raped in Delhi and there were four culprits accused of that
crime
. Among those four, two of them were minors so they were not punished as the other two criminals. Recently, in West Bengal, a doctor was assaulted and brutally murdered by multiple minors as they knew that they would be released and would not be brutally penalized.
However
, sometimes it is the situation that forces the person to commit a
crime
. A
crime
could have a reason behind it. To illustrate, On 31st December 2021, some thieves entered our neighbour's house at midnight and were trying to rob them and in their self-defence, they killed one of the thieves. So, Proper investigation is necessary before penalizing a person and
punishment
should be given after analyzing the circumstances in which the
crime
has occurred. The same
punishment
for all crimes can help us in making a safe and secure society but innocent people will
also
be penalized for the unintentional
crime
they committed. So, In my opinion, proper investigation and circumstances should be considered before punishing them.
Submitted by anash.suhail on

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task response
Consider improving your introduction by clearly stating the two views that will be discussed. Currently, the first sentence is a bit unclear and can be rephrased for better comprehension.
coherence cohesion
More effectively organize your body paragraphs. You might benefit from using topic sentences to clearly introduce each viewpoint. This will improve the logical flow of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure consistent use of singular and plural forms, such as 'a crime' vs. 'crimes'. Check for minor grammatical mistakes and punctuation to enhance readability and professionalism.
task response
The essay presents a balanced discussion with relevant examples for both viewpoints, which is essential for achieving a higher score.
coherence cohesion
You have a conclusion that clearly states your position on the issue, tying the essay together effectively.
task response
Your examples, such as the 2012 Delhi case and the self-defense scenario, are relevant and contribute well to your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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