IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie chart shows the amount of money that a children’s charity located in the USA spent and received in one year, 2016. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart shows the amount of money that a children’s charity located in the USA spent and received in one year, 2016. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie chart presents the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
money
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 used for both spent and received at children's charity
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
located in the United States in 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total
amount
Use synonyms
both
Change preposition
of both
show examples
 revenue and spent are in the same range. It is obvious that almost all of
received
Correct article usage
the received
show examples
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
show examples
 from population-donated food for children.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the most expenditures
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 for the program and
also
Linking Words
 facilities. The
amount
Use synonyms
 of
money
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 received to take care of their children, the vast majority of donors support food 68.8 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 a fewer part that comes from the government, investment, communities and other income, the total is only 15.2 per
cent
Use synonyms
. No one can deny that
they're
Change the verb form
they also have
show examples
also
Linking Words
 have to spend
money
Use synonyms
 too. It is
obviously
Change the word
obvious
show examples
 that a huge of
money
Use synonyms
 is paid to program services 95.8 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, the charity
also
Linking Words
 uses the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
money
Use synonyms
 for fundraising, management and general at the same time, respectively 2.6,
1.6
Correct word choice
and 1.6
show examples
 per
cent
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 82%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words amount, money, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: