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Writing Samples
Band 8

The tables show the milk and butter fat percentages among different ages. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables show the milk and butter fat percentages among different ages. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tables #show #milk #butter #percentages #ages #information #features #comparisons
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The given 2 tables illustrate the percentages of milk and
butter
Use synonyms
 fat among different
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be observed that Low-fat milk and
butter
Use synonyms
 dominated all the
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 except the less than 25
group
Use synonyms
 where Full fat was superior, excluding the 45-65 and 65+
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 in
butter
Use synonyms
 which showed almost similar percentages.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the younger
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
(<25) consumed 59% and 41% Full fat and low fat respectively. All the other
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 showed the same pattern with Low fat being more, as
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 26-45, 45-65, and more than 65 drank 80%, 55%, and 70% Low fat and 20%, 45%, and 30% Full fat sequentially.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the
butter
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 demonstrated a similar pattern to milk in the youngest
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
(<25) with 60% and 40% Full fat and Low fat simultaneously.
However
Linking Words
,
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 45-65 and 65+ consumed both types of fat almost equally. The
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 of 26-45 uses 38% full fat and 62% Low fat.
Submitted by vishank.chauhan19504 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words butter, age, groups, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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