IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some believe children should be taught to give speeches and presentations in school. why is this? What other skills do you think it is important to be taught in schools

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Based on
a
Correct determiner usage
this
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 notion, some believe that giving lectures
for
Change preposition
to
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students
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 is helpful.
This
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 idea could have some reasons, which will be discussed later.
Besides
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, other skills like
stress
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 reduction and time -management are crucial
which
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and
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 must be learned. To commence with, Skill making is the key factor of
school
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 age. Children learn different
abilities
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 through trial and error. Every matter that a kid masters
,
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apply
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 is a step towards brain development. specifically, giving
speech
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speeches
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 and
presentation
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presentations
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help
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helps
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 youngsters
to
Verb problem
apply
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expand their knowledge and positive personality traits.
Moreover
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, being a lecturer makes a dominant expression for pupils, and
subsequently
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, increases their
self- confidence
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self-confidence
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.
For instance
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,
students
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 who have more performances for their classmates, have more social
abilities
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 and feel more acceptable and appealing than others.
On the other hand
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, there are some talents that their acquisition in
school
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 age is imperative. These achievements could pacify the progression path for
students
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. Specifically,
stress
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 reduction techniques and time- management must be highlighted. These
abilities
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 help the learners to manage their worries and have a productive outcome.
For example
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, based on
researches
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research
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, when
students
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 get alert that
stress
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 is not only their problem and could happen to everyone, and controlling time to have a successful score is achievable, their performance in
school
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 will increase. In a nutshell, giving
lecture
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lectures
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 and
presentation
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presentations
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 advocators.
This
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 matter
,
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apply
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 could be related to increasing knowledge
expand
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expansion
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 and boosting self-confidence.
Also
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, time- management and
stress
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 reduction techniques are the
abilities
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 that must be learned
in
Change preposition
at
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school
Use synonyms
 age to provide productive outcomes.

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and answers both parts of the question. However, some points could be further developed to provide a more comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas needs improvement. Consider using clear topic sentences and transitions to guide the reader through your arguments.
language use
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that detract from the clarity of your writing. Proofread your essay to correct these issues.
task achievement
Your essay would benefit from more detailed examples to support your points. This would help to make your arguments more convincing.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion need to be clearer and more distinctive. Ensure your introduction presents the main ideas, and conclusion summarizes key points effectively.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt at addressing both parts of the question, which shows a clear understanding of the task requirements.
task achievement
Your essay covers a range of relevant points, demonstrating a good breadth of ideas.
task achievement
Your points about the benefits of giving speeches and presentations, as well as the importance of time management and stress reduction, are well-chosen and relevant.
coherence cohesion
The essay structure is generally logical and easy to follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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