Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it a responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?
In recent years, the disparity between wealthy and poorer
nations
has become increasingly pronounced, raising the question of whether affluent countries
have an obligation to share their resources with less fortunate ones. This
debate encompasses several critical issues, including the provision of basic needs such
as food and education. While
some argue that wealthy nations
should be mandated to extend their wealth to poorer nations
, others contend that it is the responsibility
of the governments
of these nations
to care for their citizens. In this
essay, I will discuss both perspectives before reaching a conclusion.
On one hand, proponents of the view that wealthy nations
should assist poorer countries
argue that this
is a moral obligation. Wealthy nations
often have resources far exceeding their needs, and sharing a portion of that wealth can significantly improve the quality of life in poorer countries
. For example
, providing access to education can empower individuals, leading to increased economic opportunities and self-sufficiency. Moreover
, in a world interconnected by globalization, issues such
as poverty, hunger, and health crises do not remain confined to one region. When wealthy nations
invest in poorer nations
, they are not only addressing humanitarian concerns but also
enhancing global stability and security. In this
sense, it can be argued that wealthier countries
have a responsibility
to contribute to the well-being of less fortunate nations
.
Conversely
, those who argue that it is primarily the responsibility
of governments
in poorer nations
to take care of their citizens contend that self-sufficiency is crucial for long-term development. Relying on aid from wealthier nations
can lead to a cycle of dependency, where poor nations
fail to build their infrastructure and improve their economies due to
external reliance. Furthermore
, not all assistance from wealthier nations
is effectively utilized, as mismanagement and corruption can diminish the impact of such
support. Therefore
, governments
in poorer countries
must prioritize the establishment of effective governance and economic policies that empower their citizens. Instead
of waiting for aid, these countries
should invest in local resources and human capital to forge a sustainable future.
In conclusion, while
there are compelling arguments for both sides of the debate, I believe that a balanced approach is necessary. Wealthy nations
should indeed contribute to alleviating poverty and providing essential services in poorer nations
, particularly in times of crises such
as natural disasters or pandemics. However
, this
should not negate the responsibility
of local governments
to develop their nations
independently. A collaborative effort, where wealthy nations
provide support while
poorer nations
strive for self-sufficiency and governance reform, could create a more equitable world. Ultimately, it is through a combination of shared responsibility
and local agency that we can hope to address global inequities and promote sustainable development.Submitted by SvetlanaDinara on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses both sides of the debate, discussing the moral obligations of wealthy nations as well as the importance of self-sufficiency for poorer nations. However, including more concrete examples and data could strengthen your argument even further.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized and flows logically from one point to another, maintaining a clear structure throughout. Continue to use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph's main idea as effectively as you have done here.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction that sets up the debate well and clearly outlines what you will discuss in the essay.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and presents a balanced view, reinforcing your overall argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are clearly presented and easy to follow, demonstrating a thorough understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The use of phrases like 'on one hand' and 'conversely' helps guide the reader through your argument, enhancing the essay's coherence and cohesion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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