The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion mil be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life.

#idea #career #fashion #mil #careers #money #education #life

In the new era,

people

easily have the

oportunity

Correct your spelling

opportunity

to access higher education;

for instance

, the new fashion is to have more than

two

careers

as a chance to

ear

Correct your spelling

earn

show examples

money

than having just one or even nothing. That phenomenon has to be evaluated depending on the country to be analyzed. To illustrate it, it is not the same,

study

two

careers

Colombia

and one in Europe. In

this

essay, I will explain

pros

Correct article usage

the pros

show examples

and cons

Change preposition

show examples

having many

careers

and compare

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these

two

countries. Primarily,

have

Wrong verb form

having

show examples

several ways to

earning

Wrong verb form

earn

show examples

money

is a good approach to promote

growth

Correct article usage

the growth

show examples

personal economy, impulse

people

to take courses in

further

education; even though,

study related

Add a hyphen

study-related

show examples

careers

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

a plus if you are working as a freelancer, or in the STEM area. As an illustration,

study

Replace the word

studying

show examples

statistics and computer science has more value in the

laboral

Correct your spelling

labour

market both in

Colombia

and in Europe,

due to

this

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

careers

develop similar abilities that can be used in different areas.

Moreover

people

with similar characteristics have more opportunities to get

two

jobs even more so, with the trend of these jobs being remote.

Nevertheless

, it isn't the same, has more than one

careers

Fix the agreement mistake

career

show examples

Colombia

than Europe,

that is

because education in

this

country isn't free, in comparison with almost every country in that continent.

Likewise

minimum

Add an article

the minimum

show examples

salary is lower in

Colombia

additionally

working

Add an article

the working

a working

show examples

day is longer.

For

this

reason, sometimes is hard

take

Fix the infinitive

to take

show examples

two

jobs, or

study

two

courses,

having in

Verb problem

taking

show examples

count

Correct your spelling

account

show examples

last

Correct article usage

the last

show examples

points I mentioned. To give another example,

people

Colombia

, opt for

study

courses to give

money

, leaving aside their dreams. it is important to stand out

this

because

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

quality of life

people

here

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

facing. All

thing

Fix the agreement mistake

things

show examples

cosidered

Correct your spelling

considered

before, the new fashion is just for

people

with specific conditions, poor

people

or who

lacks

Correct subject-verb agreement

lack

show examples

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

opportunities, occasionally can

be get

Change the verb form

get

show examples

another job to

ear

Correct your spelling

earn

show examples

money

To conclude

people

Change the verb form

are

show examples

adopting

this

new way in the

laboral

Correct your spelling

labour

world

as a result

of changes working.

Submitted by mariajoser3 on Thu Sep 12 2024

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task achievement

You have successfully addressed the main topic of the essay and provided a clear stance. However, your arguments could be further developed and supported with more specific examples and statistics.

coherence cohesion

While you generally maintain logical flow throughout the essay, there are some areas where the ideas could be more clearly linked and ordered. Try to use more transition words to enhance the coherence.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present and adequately summarize the main points of the essay.

task achievement

The essay demonstrates a good attempt at addressing both sides of the argument, acknowledging potential differences between Colombia and Europe.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

338 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion mil be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life.

Your opinion

There are parents who are choosing to teach children themselves at home instead of sending them to school in some countries. Do the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that educational success depends on good teacher, while others believe that students’ attitudes are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar ,which causes many health problems .Sugary products shoud be mad more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar . do you agree or disagree ?

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.