‏In many countries today, both men and women need to work full time. Therefore, some people think men and women should share household task equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#‏in #countries #men #women #work #time #people #household #e #g #children

‏In many countries today, both

men

and

women

need to work

full

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

time

Therefore

, some people think

men

and

women

should share

household

task

Fix the agreement mistake

tasks

show examples

equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? In recent times

household

tasks

have increased. It is a highly debatable issue whether

parents

should share

household

tasks

, or whether it is the

women

's responsibility.

This

essay will outline the benefits of helping each other in-home activities. Working with both males and females together has a vital role in social life. It promotes a sense of collaboration between

parents

which can lead to empathy.

For example

, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University illustrates that 90% of

parents

live happier lives than those who depend only on

women

Furthermore

, helping each other with

household

tasks

may open doors to exploring a new experience. If the

men

try to cook food, potentially they will be empowered to cook various types of food.

Thus

, they could learn and gain experience from each other.

In addition

parents

can learn to become independent people.

this

may help them when they travel abroad.

For instance

, my friend Fatma her husband always helps her and now he is self-reliant as he can clean and wash clothes when he travels abroad.

Moreover

, the benefits of helping each other are not only limited to

household

tasks

but

also

have a big impact on saving

time

Men

and

women

would often finish their work early and without effort. To illustrate, my sister has enough

time

to visit her relatives and shopping

due to

her husband's help. So,

this

can make the family more relaxed. In conclusion, boosting self-esteem, gaining many skills , being independent people and saving

time

are all the benefits of sharing

household

tasks

Therefore

, the idea of depending only on

women

should be stopped. Both males and females should have a balanced life.

Submitted by 13570581 on Fri Sep 13 2024

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grammar

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coherence

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clarity

Elaborate a bit more on your main points to enhance clarity—add some more detailed explanations or additional evidence to back your claims.

structure

The essay concludes effectively and reinforces the main points in a strong manner.

examples

Good use of relevant and specific examples, which make the argument more convincing.

structure

Solid logical structure throughout the essay, making it easy to follow the flow of ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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‏In many countries today, both men and women need to work full time. Therefore, some people think men and women should share household task equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The gap between the rich and the poor is increasingly wide, as poor people become poorer and rich people become richer. What problems could this situations cause? what are the solutions to address those problems?

Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development.

One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development?