Nowsday, a growing numboer of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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In the present day, many people tend to shift their treatments from usual doctors to

alternative

Use synonyms

medicines. In

this

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essay, both the advantages and drawbacks of

this

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situation will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached. On the one hand, there are many significant negative consequences associated with the shift to

alternative

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medicine

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nowadays.

First,

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many types of local

alternative

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medicine

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lack medical research and strong evidence of their successful treatments, as most of them were created from cultural beliefs and random experts. Receiving traditional local

treatment

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could be seriously harmful when individuals have underlying medical conditions.

For example

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, some with osteoporosis or deep vein thrombosis, their life would be at risk if they get some local

treatment

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massages, leading to bone fracture and cardiac arrest. Distraction from essential help from doctors by

alternative

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medicine

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is another concern, resulting in a delay in

treatment

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. Patients with cancer tend to use

alternative

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medicine

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before the disease progresses to an uncured point.

However

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, people with

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

health problems can benefit from

alternative

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ways, being as a spiritual curative way for hopeless patients with non-curative diseases

such

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late-state

Correct your spelling

late-stage

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cancer, improving their mental health and giving hope.

Alternative

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medicines are the best option for persons with low income who cannot afford expensive

medicine

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or operation from the healthcare system.

Although

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they are not reliable as usual

treatment

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, some benefits from them could be enough.

For instance

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, workers with unsustainable finances, usually have some muscle pain which can be relieved by traditional

medicine

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like massage and acupuncture. In Summary,

while

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alternative

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medicines provide significant benefits

such

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as spirited curative and affordable, focusing on these alternatives

also

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has negative impacts including complications from unreliable outcomes and distraction from the main

treatment

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. Ultimately, I believe that the drawbacks of

this

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situation outweigh the benefits.

sippakorn.wetFri Sep 13 2024

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clarity

Consider revising some grammatical mistakes and awkward phrasing for clarity. For example, 'Distraction from essential help from doctors by alternative medicine is another concern' can be rephrased to 'Another concern is that alternative medicine can distract patients from seeking essential help from doctors.'

support examples

Try to present more specific and detailed examples to support your points. For example, when discussing how alternative medicine can be a spiritual curative way, provide an example of a specific therapy or case study that illustrates this point.

critical analysis

Engage in a bit more critical analysis regarding the drawbacks and benefits. Discuss why, despite some benefits, the drawbacks might have a more significant long-term impact on public health.

essay structure

The essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction and a summarizing conclusion.

balanced argument

You have effectively raised and discussed both the advantages and disadvantages of alternative medicines, which demonstrates a balanced approach.

formal language

The language is generally formal and appropriate for academic writing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Nowsday, a growing numboer of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Your opinion

Planting trees is very important for the environment. Some people say trees should be planted in the vacant areas of city and towns, while others say housing facilities should be built instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

More and more people prefer to read ebooks rather than paper books. What are the reasons for this? What problems can this cause for libraries?

It will be better to have wide use of driverless cars for individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think person happiness is directly related to economic success, while others believe this depends on other factors. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.