Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #phones #school

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It is often argued that

children

should be forbidden from utilizing mobile

devices

class

while

others disagree and think that

children

can use their

phones

during

class

. Personally, I completely agree with the first statement, and in

this

essay, I will demonstrate that point of view. On the one hand, mobile

phones

are an excellent resource for learning for

children

For instance

, Google,

Youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

, or learning apps are used to search for information or learn new languages, which support skill development and enhance knowledge.

Moreover

, cell

phones

can be a source of entertainment after

class

For example

, young students play games or listen to music during break time. It helps them relax comfortably, and they can absorb lessons better.

On the other hand

children

should be prohibited from using mobile

devices

because it wastes a huge amount of time, and leads to electronic

devices

(

such

as smartphones, or tablets, etc.) becoming addicted. Reliance on electronic

devices

makes it difficult for them to focus on schoolwork, and social isolation

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and reduces physical activity.

As a result

, it decreases their productivity.

Furthermore

, prolonged exposure to computers or smartphones brings about healthy effects.

For example

, it leads to sleep disruption, eye diseases, or mental health.

Therefore

, it affects family finances and imposes a burden on society.

To conclude

, even though using

phones

class

can help our young

children

improve their knowledge

as well as

provide entertainment, there are harmful effects on

children

's physical and mental health.

That is

why I agree to ban

phones

from school.

Submitted by phuongdungnurse on Thu Apr 04 2024

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Task Achievement

Ensure to present a balanced view of both sides before stating your own opinion to provide a more comprehensive discussion.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the connectivity between your ideas.

General

Remember to proofread your essay to correct minor grammar and spelling errors for a polished final submission.

Relevant Specific Examples

You did a good job providing relevant examples to support your points.

Logical Structure

You effectively structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Introduction/Conclusion Present

Your conclusion succinctly summarized your arguments and re-stated your opinion, making it a strong finish to your essay.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Distraction
Cyberbullying
Concentration
Emergency communication
Digital literacy
Educational resources
Social development
Self-regulation
Enforcement
Socioeconomic status
Technology access
Learning apps
Screen time
Peer interaction
School policy

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Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, most shops and products become identical. Some people think it is a positive development, while others believe it is a negative development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The society would benefit from a ban on all forms of advertising because it serves no useful purpose, and can even be damaging. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the main benefit of international cooperation is in the environment, others maintain that the major profit is the development of world business. Discuss the both views and give your own opinion.

Due to poorer countries wxperiencing a brain drain they are seeing many professionals, such as doctors and teachers, leaving to work in more developed countries. what problems does this cause? What solutions can be suggested to deal with this situation?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.