Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic. It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

From a young age,
children
must be able to differentiate what is correct from what is wrong.
Punishments
are
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
to be implemented, but it should not be the sole reason that they are doing the
right
thing.
Children
should do and support what is
right
because they know that
that is
right
. Some parents may argue that in order to keep
children
from doing wrong things, they should be scared of the punishment.
However
, I might argue that making
children
afraid of
punishments
will only make them cowards. In order for a child to know truly what is correct and what is immoral or unethical
is
Verb problem
they have
show examples
to make themselves understand why. Teach them why it is wrong to bully
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
, why a student should study hard and how to do the
right
thing even when everything seems against them. If a child
reach
Change the verb form
reaches
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the extent that he or she
did
Verb problem
made
show examples
a mistake, he or she must be disciplined correctly. A good discipline involves a redemptive
action
and a punitive one. For a redemptive
action
, a parent or a teacher must be able to convince the child that what they did is wrong. A parent can be angry but not too much that he or she would be more scared of the parent than doing the
worng
Correct your spelling
wrong
thing. After that, parents may give them
punishments
such
as spank or confiscating their gadgets for a time so that they will regret
thair
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
actions.
Last
and most importantly, parents should give their
children
a second chance for them to do the
right
thing when faced with
similar
Add an article
a similar
show examples
situation in order for them to learn their lesson and for them to get used to doing the correct
action
. I believe that
punishments
are
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
for
children
to distinguish what to do and what not to do. But
on the other hand
, implementing punishment only will not work unless they know the consequences and they know how to do the
right
action
.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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coherence
Try to develop the introduction more clearly. A strong introduction sets the stage for your arguments.
task
Include specific examples and scenarios to illustrate your points more effectively.
coherence
Ensure the conclusion summarizes the main points and restates your position clearly.
coherence
The argument maintains clarity and coherence, with a logical progression of ideas.
task
The essay offers a balanced view on the necessity of punishment and its implementation.
coherence
The support for the argument is clear, especially in discussing the role of understanding and redemptive actions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • moral education
  • sense of responsibility and empathy
  • positive reinforcement
  • constructive punishment
  • loss of privileges
  • mental health
  • understanding of authority and discipline
  • ethical implications
  • humane and justifiable
  • cultural perspectives
  • disciplinary measures
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