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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in New Port city center from 2003-2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in New Port city center from 2003-2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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This
Linking Words
 chart illustrates the number of three different crimes that occurred in New Port between 2003 and 2012.
Overall
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, except for the numbers in 2004, whilst
burglary
Use synonyms
 declined sharply, vehicle
theft
Use synonyms
 and robbery fluctuated slightly over the period.
Additionally
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,
burglary
Use synonyms
 overtook the car
theft
Use synonyms
 in around 2007 and showed a sharp fall. The number of burglaries was almost 3,500 in 2003. After 2003, it showed an escalation of almost 200 incidents,
however
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, it reversed and dropped drastically by 2008. From 2008 onward, incidents of
burglary
Use synonyms
 varied slightly by 2012 and reached almost 1300 in 2012.
On the other hand
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, car
theft
Use synonyms
 and robbery were approximately 2750 and 700, respectively. From 2003 to 2005, they remained relatively stable.
However
Linking Words
, car
theft
Use synonyms
 fell significantly to almost 2000 in 2006. Meanwhile, the number of the stealers saw a slight drop. From 2008 onward,
although
Linking Words
 robbery was almost flat,
burglary
Use synonyms
 experienced a small increase.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words burglary, theft with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instances of crime
  • significant decline
  • noticeable change
  • fluctuating trend
  • relatively stable
  • minor fluctuations
  • dramatic reduction
  • converged towards
  • crime rate
  • time frame
  • notable trajectory
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