Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages of television for children.

#children #time #television

Nowadays, there are a lot of good

things

. These

Add a missing verb

are one

show examples

one

Correct determiner usage

some

show examples

things

Correct article usage

the things

show examples

that

affects

Correct subject-verb agreement

affect

show examples

our

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. Watching

television

is one of the

things

Some

Change preposition

For some

show examples

people

this

is a positive idea,

while

others disagree and think it is a waste of

time

This

essay agrees

that

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

watching

television

is useful.

this

essay will discuss both points of view. First of all, Watching

television

for children is useful, to explain that , the

Correct your spelling

show examples

has

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of different channels ,

such

as educational programs, sports and cartoons .

In addition

to that,

television

is helpful for some kids, to illustrate that, the new version of

television

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

become bigger.

For

example

, in my country some people and I

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

use mobile

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

television

to study for exams.

On the other hand

television

can be harmful,

in other words

, if they stay

to watch

Change the verb form

watching

show examples

for

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time

they could get

Correct article usage

an eyes

show examples

eyes

Fix the agreement mistake

eye

show examples

infection, as an

example

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

, some people

uses

Change the verb form

use

show examples

eyeglasses because

thiar

Correct your spelling

their

this

eyesight becomes weak from watching

Correct your spelling

show examples

with out

Correct your spelling

without

show examples

protection, Not only that,

television

waste

time

, as an

example

for that some kids could become distracted from their own life and stay focused on watching movies ,to give a clear

example

, from my experience,my youngest brother is addicted to

television

so he always stay on watching and got distracted from hes school homeworks. In my opinion, after a detailed review of both points of view, I believe that

Television

is very helpful when you use it

Change preposition

show examples

your free

time

has

Verb problem

show examples

kind of

entertainment

Replace the word

entertaining

show examples

things

Fix the agreement mistake

thing

show examples

since watching sports and playing video games is my habit.

Submitted by waleedal3ayed on Sun Sep 15 2024

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task achievement

The essay could benefit from a clearer thesis statement in the introduction. Try to succinctly summarize the main points you will discuss in the essay.

coherence cohesion

Some sentences could be more concise and clear. Avoid overly complex sentences and ensure each idea is expressed succinctly.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a structured beginning and end to your essay.

task achievement

The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of television for children, demonstrating a balanced perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

educational programs
diverse cultures
entertainment options
language skills
critical thinking
social awareness
shared experience
sedentary lifestyle
inappropriate content
academic performance
attention problems
social skills
commercial influence
addiction

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Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages of television for children.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Most employers nowadays put increasing emphasis on social skills. Some people believe that social skills are important in addition to good qualification for job success. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish.

In some countries students pay the collage and universities fees themselves, but in other it is paid by the government. Do the advantages of government money outweigh the disadvantages?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays it is easy to apply for and be given a credit card. However, some people experience problems when they are not able to pay their debts back. Do the advantages of credit cards outweigh the disadvantages?