IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The best way to improve health is to do regular exercise. To what extent do you agree?

#health #exercise
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Maintaining good
health
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 is essential for a fulfilling life and personal well-being. The optimal way to enhance
health
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 is by doing
exercise
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 regularly. I partially agree with the thought and the reasons for my inclination will be articulated in the forthcoming paragraphs. To commence with, one of the main reasons behind disagreement is that
exercise
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 can be helpful in strengthening
health
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 but other ways can
also
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 help to do the same. A healthy lifestyle and diet
also
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 equally contribute to maintaining good well-being.
For
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example
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, a routine that includes activities
such
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 as yoga and meditation can boost
health
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 in the same manner as
exercise
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 and sometimes even more.
Furthermore
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, not all individuals are capable of doing
exercise
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 as some might be suffering from various injuries or may be physically challenged.
For
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example
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, people who are born with no legs find it very difficult to perform
exercise
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 on a daily basis. Other than that, doing good
exercise
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 requires time, and individuals who have very hectic and busy schedules find it very difficult to invest that time in
exercise
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.
For
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example
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, people who work 12 hours a day are likely to be burnt out from the work they put in leaving them with no time for
exercise
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.
However
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, engaging in
exercise
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 on a regular basis has numerous benefits and it keeps the body fit and fine.
Exercise
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 not only boosts physical well-being but
also
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 keeps one mentally fit.
For
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example
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, physical activities like push-ups and squats are very useful for proper fitness.
To conclude
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, in my perspective
exercise
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 can help one to stay fit but the choice depends on individuals as every on have a different body condition and situation. Other options like yoga and meditation can
also
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 be used to improve
overall
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 fitness.
Submitted by vishank.chauhan19504 on

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task achievement
Consider making your position clearer in the introduction by stating the partial agreement more explicitly.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the central argument in a balanced way.
coherence cohesion
Review sentence structure and grammar for clearer readability; some sentences are slightly awkward.
coherence cohesion
Try to use more transitional phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the argument well.
supported main points
Relevant and specific examples are provided to support the main points.
logical structure
The logical structure of the essay is strong, making it easy to follow the arguments.
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