IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many student choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Do you think this is a good idea or a waste of time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is an irrefutable fact that in the contemporary world, taking a
year
 off after high school is a popular trend. Some people argue that it is a waste of time.
However
, I believe that it is a positive development as it allows teenagers to gain some practical experience
as well as
 give them time to explore other best options.
This
 essay will analyze the reason behind my perspective
along with
 examples in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, the gap before university provides an opportunity for
students
 to travel to different parts of the world to gain an understanding of the employment market . To explain, travelling allows pupils to interact with different communities and professionals which automatically
enhance
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
show examples
 their communication abilities
as well as
 their network.
Moreover
, improves their understanding of the requirement's current market which is extremely crucial to exploring better career options in a competitive society.
For instance
, my brother took a
year
 off after school as he was confused about whether his skills aligned with market demand or not. Throughout the
year
 he travelled to different cities and
as a result
, he changed his stream from business to science as the future demands IT people
instead
 of management workers.
Furthermore
, learners who work before proceeding with their graduation can easily excel throughout their academic journey.
In other words
, through the employment process, they can understand the value of each minute
along with
 the importance of finance management which they earned with their efforts.
Besides
 that, work experience builds confidence in
students
along with
 a practical understanding of theoretical concepts.
For example
, as per the experiment of a UK University on 30
students
 of business, learners who took a gap for work were more intelligent in comparison to other classmates because of their practical knowledge. In conclusion, I believe gap
year
 not only builds confidence in
students
, it gives them a chance to understand the practical use of theory concepts.
Submitted by arshkaurbrar on

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task response
To elevate your essay, consider removing repetitive phrases and focusing on the clarity of each point. For example, refine your transitions and avoid sentences that seem to repeat previously stated ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure you maintain a consistent voice throughout the essay. While the introduction and conclusion are strong, the body paragraphs could benefit from a more precise and varied vocabulary.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear and well-organized structure. The introduction is engaging and sets up your argument effectively, and the conclusion succinctly wraps up your points.
task response
The examples used in the body paragraphs are relevant and support your main points well. These examples add depth to your argument and demonstrate a solid understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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