The only way to improve the safety on our own road is to have stricter punishment for driving offenders. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is established that

road

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safety

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is important worldwide. There is only one method to increase our own

road

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safety

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is to implement strict

rules

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for driving criminals. I am in complete agreement with

this

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proposition because it would be beneficial for

individuals

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and society.

To begin

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with, one

punishment

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for drivers who do not follow

rules

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is a licence suspension.

For example

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, it is observed that the

road

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traffic

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accident rate is very low in a country like Canada as people strictly follow

traffic

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signals every time.

This

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is because

individuals

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will lose their driving licence if they disobey legislation which leads to more

safety

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for pedestrians and cyclists on the

road

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Furthermore

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, another

punishment

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would be to increase fines. People would not want to give extra money to the

traffic

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police officers for breaking

rules

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, which makes them obey instructions for

road

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safety

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While

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it cannot be denied that there are other ways to improve

road

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safety

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like improving

road

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design and infrastructure,

this

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can be advantageous when

individuals

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use it properly. To illustrate, the governmental authorities provide funds to build well-maintained roads in India,

however

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, public activities like blocked drainage systems and

traffic

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congestion can damage the roads.

Moreover

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, stricter

punishment

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like mandatory jail time would create fear among

individuals

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. To avoid

this

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, people will make sure to follow

rules

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for

road

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safety

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, which would be beneficial for

individuals

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and society. In conclusion,

although

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other methods can be followed to improve

road

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safety

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such

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as developing infrastructure on the

road

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, it is crucial to implement strict

punishment

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like licence suspension, fine money and mandatory jail time for maintaining roads.

parmarheena277254Tue Sep 17 2024

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task achievement

One area that requires improvement is clarity and depth in your ideas. Although your arguments are generally well-presented, delving a bit deeper into how exactly stricter punishments improve road safety can enhance your response. This will make your argument more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has good structure, but the transition between points can be smoother. Using linking words such as 'Additionally,' 'Moreover,' or 'However,' can create a smoother flow and aid in the reader’s understanding.

task achievement

You could improve the depth of the examples you provide, relating them more directly to the point you are making. This will help to strengthen the argument and show a well-rounded understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Including more explicit connections between your ideas and explanations will enhance cohesion. Make clear how your examples and arguments are interconnected, which will boost the overall coherence of your essay.

task achievement

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main arguments and points, reinforcing your stance on the issue.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is generally well-structured with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which contributes to the logical flow of your text.

task achievement

You incorporate relevant specific examples to support your main points, which adds credibility to your arguments.

task achievement

You clearly address the task prompt and maintain focus on the main topic throughout your essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

7.5

Introduction & conclusion present

7.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

7.5

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

7.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

deterrent
infractions
harsher penalties
over-policing
driver education
automated traffic enforcement
holistic approach
disproportionately
legal representation
substance abuse
awareness campaigns
road infrastructure
legal measures
traffic regulations

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The only way to improve the safety on our own road is to have stricter punishment for driving offenders. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It has been suggested that cars and public transport should be banned from city centres and only bicycles be allowed instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others thank that there more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to the transport officer about a problem with transport system in your area. In your letter - Describe the situation you are facing - Why you consider it a problem - What changes you would like to recommend