Write about the following topic: All over the world, the rich are becoming richer and the poor are becoming poorer. What problems does this cause? How can we overcome the problems of poverty? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
The increasing income gap between wealthy and poor
people
is becoming one of the serious issues around the world. It causes increased mortality and morbidity among low-income people
. However
, it can be solved by investing more money on
the Change preposition
in
education
and the
Correct article usage
apply
healthcare
of the people
with poor financial status.
The biggest problem of this
phenomenon is the higher number of deaths and higher prevalence rate of infectious diseases among the
Correct article usage
apply
people
with no money. Firstly
, the income of those people
is not enough for them, either to receive good
Add an article
a good
education
or to access healthcare
. Secondly
, they have difficulties in obtaining jobs
as they are not educated well for high-salaried jobs
. Therefore
, they need to depend on low-wage jobs
. Moreover
, they cannot work efficiently due to
their poor health status. For example
, a recent study has shown that there is a positive relationship between the
attendance and the wealth of the employees.
But, there are a number of potential solutions available. The government should cut more taxes Correct article usage
apply
from
wealthy Change preposition
on
people
. The state tax revenue could be used to invest in poor peoples' education
and healthcare
. They should be provided with free education
and healthcare
. Empowering them with the knowledge and the
skills required for the current job market will enable them to secure good Correct article usage
apply
jobs
. Accessible healthcare
will make them productive individuals, who have a
potential to earn more money by working long hours and by doing multiple Correct article usage
the
jobs
.
In conclusion, the wealth gap between the rich and poor causes some serious issues, such
as death. However
, it can be tackled by investing in poor people
.Submitted by gowsht on
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention particular countries where educational or healthcare investments have significantly improved the situation of poorer populations.
coherence cohesion
Try to make the transitions between your points a bit smoother. Using linking phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'Additionally,' or 'Consequently' can help improve the flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and concise introduction and conclusion, effectively summarizing the main points.
task achievement
The response addresses the prompt thoroughly, discussing both the problems caused by the income gap and potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are presented clearly and logically, making it easy for the reader to follow the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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