IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

You need a website for your business, and you would like to ask your friend to build it. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter •Include a brief description of your business •Explain what you would like to have on the website •Provide some ideas on the use of images on the website.

#website #business #friend #•include #description #•explain #•provide #images
Dear Navneet, I hope you and your family are doing splendidly. I am doing great too. It has been a long time since we met each other. As you know I started my
business
last
 month,
therefore
, I am writing
this
 letter for your helping hand in making the best website for my
business
. Let me describe my
business
 so that it will be easy for you to design a webpage for a start-up. My
business
 includes sales of child's clothes
as well as
 their footwear.
Although
 I have a huge collection of different brands which are in trend still website is still crucial for the easiest reach of clients. I want you to build a strong website so that customers can easily buy the available stock of products without visiting my shop physically. Apart from that, I want you to add a feedback feature to my
business
 webpage which I can use to improve my product services
according to
 the requirements.
Additionally
, I suggest you add more and more pictures of designer clothes as it will be easy for me to attract buyers without any extra promotions. As per my understanding, visuals are always A plus point for every brand. I hope you understand my requirements, even though I know you have enough knowledge and experience so please do add whichever you think is beneficial for me. Hope to see you soon. Best regards Arshdeep tour
Submitted by arshkaurbrar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Consider breaking down some of the larger paragraphs into smaller ones to enhance readability and maintain a clear single idea per paragraph.
task achievement
While the letter is quite clear, adding a brief section to further emphasize the benefits of the website for business growth could strengthen the task achievement.
suitable writing tone
The letter has a warm and personal tone which is very suitable for writing to a friend.
greeting and closing
Great use of greeting and closing which adds to the overall friendliness and appropriateness of the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: