Some people think city planners should create more green spaces and plant trees. Others believe that they should focus on building new homes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays, there are
being
arguments about Unnecessary verb
apply
should
they construct that kind of Correct word choice
whether should
spaces
and sow trees or Fix the agreement mistake
space
instead
of it, other people state that should they address to
Change preposition
apply
the
building new houses. That's a big debatable topic for all of us and of Correct article usage
apply
course
Add a comma
course,
ee
need to find Correct your spelling
we
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
on
it.
In my mind, there are pros and cons Change preposition
to
about
these disagreements. And I think Change preposition
to
this
is more depend
on Replace the word
dependent
is
that town or city. Because we can create several open areas in the towns and may build lots of places for human needs rather than big cities .
When it comes to the cities, people need to plant more plants than Unnecessary verb
apply
to
buildings Change preposition
in
due to
there are majority
of them anyway. Add an article
the majority
a majority
Also
trees will be immensely effective since their fresh air and health.
In conclusion, I mention that as I Add a comma
Also,
told
above, we must try to extend places with trees as much as possible for later population don't face the problems with the light of air pollution. Verb problem
said
This
is up to the buildings as factories. This
will give more
Correct article usage
a more
convinient
and relaxing environment.Correct your spelling
convenient
Submitted by omondavlat91 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both views of the topic, which is good. However, to achieve a higher score, you need to provide more specific examples to support your points. Concrete examples can help illustrate your arguments more effectively.
coherence cohesion
You've made a commendable effort in structuring your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, try to ensure that your paragraphs are more logically structured. For example, clearly state and expand on the main point of each paragraph and use linking words to guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your main points need to be more distinctly supported with well-developed arguments. This will help improve the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. For example, if you state that green spaces are important, explain why they are beneficial in detail.
task achievement
The essay's overall message is somewhat clear but can be enhanced by improving language accuracy and using more varied vocabulary. Consider rephrasing some of the sentences for better clarity and avoiding repetitive words or phrases.
task achievement
You successfully covered both perspectives of the debate, which is essential for this type of essay.
coherence cohesion
The structure of having an introduction, body, and conclusion is present, which is a crucial aspect of writing an organized essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!