Some people think that housing facilities should be built in the vacant areas of cities and towns, while others believe that parks should be set instead. Planting trees is very important for the environment. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It is largely argued that facilities should be built in huge
areas
of cities, but others say that parks should be set up first because planting trees is absolutely essential for the environment. I completely agree that planting trees is important, so the park should be set up by the government first.
Firstly
, planting trees brings huge benefits for housing and residents moreover
people can breathe easily with clean air.
Living in urban areas
has some bad effects, although
there are some advantages to this
busy area. Natives sometimes make complaints that they always breathe in the polluted air and it causes some illnesses to them, moreover
, children become hesitant and parents absolutely do not permit them to play outside their house because the park is not set by the government the pollution can be dangerous in the future for their brain.
For instance
, in India, it is noticed that 48% of children's brain development was hampered in 2020 by the account from the Ministry of Health and one of the factors because of the limit of clean air in that country.
Secondly
, the facilities provide some important things for householders's lives, especially for a modern lifestyle.
It is a well-known fact that modern towns need more space to support residents's lives. In a hustle-bustle city, citizens need to buy or complete their needs instantly because they have to do everything faster, but in modern urban areas
, it is very popular that large space sometimes is allocated for offices or industries.
For example
, a supermarket is one of the facilities for helping the householders' needs and most of them were built in the housing areas
but not in the big areas
.
In conclusion, setting up a park for planting plants is absolutely essential because it could give more to residents in the cities or towns.Submitted by suryawatinovita on
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task achievement
Ensure that all ideas presented in the essay are fully developed and supported by relevant examples. While the essay touches on key points, some areas, especially the second paragraph, could use more elaboration.
coherence cohesion
Strive for more seamless transitions between paragraphs and ideas. Some sentences feel slightly disjointed, which can interrupt the flow of reading.
coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity in language use, and try to avoid repetition. For instance, 'bring huge benefits for housing and residents moreover' could be rephrased for better clarity.
task achievement
The essay clearly states a position in response to the prompt, which is crucial for achieving a high score in task response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance taken.
task achievement
Relevant examples are used to support the points, such as the situation in India. This strengthens the argument by providing concrete evidence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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