It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Some individuals believe that taking
risks
is a crucial issue not only in their career lives
but also
in their personal lives
. In my opinion, the drawbacks of this
activity are twofold and outweigh the benefits of it.
First of all, members of the public who take risks
in their job lives
may lose all of their achievements in the blink of an eye. Actually, although
they have a lot of knowledge in their fields, every person can make mistakes, and some of them are significantly disruptive. In addition
, people
who have this
spirit are easily deceived, so businesses manipulate them. For instance
, the majority of members of society lose all of their budget, which they collect in their lives
, by investing in pyramidal companies for a higher profit.
Further
and even more importantly, people
who have a tendency to take risks
even if they succeed and obtain a huge amount of money, they
do not have Correct pronoun usage
apply
mind's
health. Indeed, these Correct article usage
a mind's
people
always have stress that leads to detrimental effects on their health. Moreover
, whenever these ambitious people
, due to
their preferences, opt something
in their personal Change preposition
for something
lives
, they do not care about their extended or immediate family's attitudes. They, hence
, have a high possibility to destroy
their relationships, and they get Change preposition
of destroying
alone
after a period of time. Correct your spelling
along
Thus
, this
issue is prone to several ailments, such
as depression.
In conclusion, taking risks
can cause several diseases and waste money. Therefore
, irrespective of some short-term positive aspects of it, people
must avoid it.Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on
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Task Response
You have presented a balanced viewpoint on the topic and have included an introduction and a strong conclusion. To enhance your essay, ensure your main ideas are fully developed with additional examples or explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay is logically organized with an effective introduction and conclusion. However, some transitional phrases or sentences could be more varied to improve the natural flow of the argument.
Task Response
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frames the response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Main ideas are logically structured, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct disadvantage of risk-taking.