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It has become easier and more affordable for people to travel to other coutries. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? Give your opinion and relevant examples from your experience

#people #travel #coutries #development
Travelling is always the best thing to do when you are sad happy lonely or with friends, it helps you experience a lot of different cultures and places. The only problem is, travelling used to be so expensive, But in the meantime with the new affordable airlines, travelling
became
Wrong verb form
has become
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 much easier, even though it would not be so comfortable
but
Correct word choice
apply
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it is hard to find affordable things with
a
Remove the article
apply
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great quality. For me
i
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I
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 think in the future there will be more and better affordable and comfortable flights to allow everyone to travel whenever they want, with the more affordable flights even middle and low-class people are gonna be able to discover the world with the least amount of money. But in my point of view, I will use it to achieve my dream and travel half the world, it will be a great story to tell my kids when I am older, I will tell them about all the places I have visited and all the people I have met, there will be a lot of goodnight stories to tell. So, I hope that travelling becomes more and more affordable to all people, so I and everyone who loves to travel and experience the world be able to go whenever we want.
Submitted by h9715823 on

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coherence cohesion
Expand on your introduction and conclusion to provide a clear framework for your essay. This will make your writing more structured and easier to follow.
task achievement
Develop your main points with more specific examples. Personal anecdotes can be powerful, but adding examples that reflect broader trends will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on making smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas. This will enhance coherence and make your essay more engaging.
task achievement
Your enthusiasm for the topic is clearly conveyed, which makes your essay engaging and enjoyable to read.
task achievement
Your personal experiences and dreams add a unique and authentic touch to your writing, making it relatable and interesting.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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