Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money-making traditions aimed at tourists. Others, however, believe that it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Cultural
traditions
play an important role in community identity and preserving heritage.
However
, there is a debate about whether using these
traditions
for
tourism
can lead to their destruction or if it's a necessary strategy for their preservation. On one side, the development of cultural
tourism
has several negative effects. The first impact is, that when
traditions
are marketed as tourist
traditions
, they can lose their true meaning.
For instance
, traditional festivals, ceremonies or crafts might be changed to entertain visitors , which may cause them to become extinct,
this
also
leads to over-exploitation.
Additionally
, the growth of mass
tourism
seriously affects the environment and natural resources,
such
as water and air pollution
due to
waste left by tourists, and noise pollution caused by uncontrolled mass
tourism
.
On the other hand
, critics argue that
tourism
is essential for keeping
traditions
alive.
First,
the money earned from tourists can support local artists and fund cultural events.
This
financial support is the key to keeping various attraction sites from falling into disrepair. Another reason is our culture and
traditions
can be famous through tourist activities. Tourists can share pictures and stories about the area's culture with other friends or post them on social media.
This
both increases popularity and encourages the revival of
traditions
, heritage and culture.
To sum up
, there is no exact answer to whether developing
tourism
brings both positive and negative effects . The government should come up with the most optimal options and consider them carefully before making the decision to expand the
tourism
industry
Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to address all parts of the task more fully and develop your ideas in detail. For example, provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical progression and paragraph structure. At some points, transitions between ideas could be smoother.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the context and presents the main argument.
logical structure
Good efforts at providing a balanced view by discussing both positive and negative aspects of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: