IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You took an elderly member of your family, who was not able to walk properly, to a museum and he/she faced a few problems. Write a letter to the manager of the museum. In your letter, * say why you visited the museum * describe the problems you faced * suggest what can be done to avoid those problems

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
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 letter to complain about my recent visit to the newly built
museum
Use synonyms
 - " Hindu
Museum
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". I booked my tickets in advance to avoid any
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last minute
Add a hyphen
last-minute
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 hassle as I was visiting the
museum
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 with elderly members of the family. On the day of
visit
Add an article
the visit
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, I was highly disappointed, with the fact that
elevator
Correct article usage
the elevator
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 was not working and there was no access to the ramps for the wheelchair.
Moreover
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, there were no other alternatives available for elderly people to see the
museum
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 on the fifth floor. We planned the
museum
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 visit as my grandmother was eager to reconnect with the ancient culture and see how our ancestors lived. Unfortunately, we did not go to see the
museum
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 as we could not leave her alone at the entry gate.
Furthermore
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, we did not receive any reimbursement for our tickets. It was an awful experience for me and my family. I would recommend
to display
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displaying
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 an announcement on the website if there is non-availability of any service to avoid trouble
to
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for
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 your visitors. It would not let them down and they can plan well before coming over there. I hope you
would
Wrong verb form
will
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 consider my feedback and
also
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, reimburse my ticket fare. Yours faithfully, JK

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coherence cohesion
Try to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea more distinctly. This will improve the clarity and coherence of your writing.
coherence cohesion
The letter is well-structured with a clear opening, body, and closing, which makes it easy to follow.
task achievement
You have addressed all parts of the task adequately, including the reason for your visit, the problems faced, and suggestions for improvement.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is appropriate and polite, which is suitable for a formal complaint.
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