IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You have some library books that you are unable to return as a member of your family in another city has fallen sick and you have hand to go and look after them. Write a letter to the library. In you letter, you should: explaining the situation apologize for the inconvenience called and say what you are going to do

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Dear sir, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you in best of the spirits and radiant health. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to let you know that I issued some books from the college library that I failed to submit
into
Change preposition
to
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 the library on
due
Add an article
the due
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 date
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because I had to leave for my home, as my mother suffered a heart attack and she was admitted
into
Change preposition
to
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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hospital. I am very ashamed
for
Change preposition
of
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this
Linking Words
 conduct of mine and I offer my sincere apologies.
This
Linking Words
 has happened for the very first time that I failed to return books in time,
due to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
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unavoidable circumstances at my home. In order, to make up for my misconduct, I am ready to pay the applicable fine and I assure you that it will never happen in future again.
Lastly
Linking Words
, I again apologise for
this
Linking Words
 conduct of mine. I hope you will understand my
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
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 and forgive me. I am looking forward to hearing from you Yours faithfully, Jatinder.

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task achievement
While the letter is clear and covers all the required points, some of the sentences could be more fluid. Consider revising sentences for smoother transitions and a more natural flow.
coherence cohesion
You have effectively organized the letter, but the transition between the explanation and the apology could be smoother. Try to connect the sections more seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
'I hope this letter finds you in best of the spirits and radiant health.' can be rephrased to sound more natural. Consider using 'I hope this letter finds you well.'
task achievement
You've done a good job explaining your situation clearly, which makes the letter easily understandable.
task achievement
You've used a polite and respectful tone, which is appropriate for this kind of letter.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the letter is generally well-organized with a clear greeting, body, and closing.
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