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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very Important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation
According to
 some, & more or fewer countries, individuals nowadays prefer to hold ownership of a household relatively renting it out, I firmly believe both have their own positive sides, which I will be discussing below. In today's era, individuals have the same beliefs as our elders ( ancestors) used to have. why today people think owning a
house
 is better than living in a rental
house
?
Hence
, a
house
 in our culture is something emotionally connected to past memories of our ancestors,
moreover
, our own childhood and upbringing have done at the same place.
For instance
, celebrating every moment in the same space with freedom like any occasion Diwali, holi, eid, Christmas etc.
This
 shows how things are interconnected with each other in one place.
Furthermore
, memories like happy and sad moments with parents,
such
 as watching movies with them and having fun conversations.
However
, silly moments like not doing homework and arguing with parents.
Lastly
 making friends around that society and learning to play cricket and football with them, living in our own
house
 has something different feeling. Commencing with the prominent reason, why I believe renting has a positive side too
?
Change the punctuation
.
show examples
while
, nowadays people believe spending an excessive amount on a
house
 is senseless, rather than laying that amount in the bank for future needs. In spite, a person who travels a lot will think thrice before owning a household, owing to a traveller not having any permanent residency they change their places every month or a week depending upon their versatility. Even though, they prefer to invest or deposit in a bank locker. In conclusion, both sides
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 their own positive perspective, I believe owning a
house
 has more profound advantages like we can decorate it
according to
 our taste and own a permanent identity.In contrast, a rental
house
 is beneficial for people who are looking for temporary shelter to live in.
Submitted by tushalk329 on

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task achievement
Ensure your sentences are grammatically correct; avoid punctuation errors and improve sentence structure for clarity.
coherence cohesion
Try to clarify the arguments and ensure they are logically connected to the main topic.
coherence cohesion
Provide more structured paragraphs by clearly separating different points and adding relevant examples.
task achievement
The essay covers both perspectives on owning a home versus renting, fulfilling the task requirement.
task achievement
The writer has attempted to give examples and personal opinions, making the essay more engaging.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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