Some people believe that children should be brought up in cities. Others believe that the countryside offers a better environment for children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is an irrefutable fact that in the contemporary world, it is crucial to offer the best environment to
children
for their overall
growth. Some people argue that cities
are the best for children
's development, while
others reject this
notion because they believe the countryside
is much better. However
, I do agree with the former statement. This
essay will discuss both sides of the argument along with
my opinion and examples.
On the one hand, exponents like I have their own side of justification. The rationale behind their argument is the availability of health and educational facilities which enhances the chances of better progress. In other words, a child who lives in a developed city can easily get health care whenever it's required because of easy access to hospitals. However
, in countryside
, people need to travel for hours just for basic treatment. Add an article
the countryside
Moreover
, adolescents can get a better education
when they proceed with their studies in Add an article
the well
a well
well structured
institute which not only offers course Add a hyphen
well-structured
education
but also
motivates students to take part in extra-curricular activities like swimming, cricket, chess
games, and Correct word choice
and chess
as a result
, children
's high mental and physical growth. For example
, according to
the research of Cambridge University, the success of a person highly relies on their education
base so it is very crucial for parents to provide the best schools to their children
which are usually available in cities
.
On the other hand
, contenders of this
argument have their own side of the coin. According to
them environment of the countryside
helps children
to understand the value of kindness as well as
humanity which is quite difficult to learn in cities
because of parents' workaholic life. To explain, no
no doubt in Rephrase
apply
cities
they can easily gain advanced skills which can definitely help adolescents to become successful in their life but unity in small villages give
them guidance to become a good human being through small interactions in Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
neighbourhood
every day. Add an article
the neighbourhood
For example
, I learned the importance of humanity through the local people of my village when they take over others' tasks during their health issues as well as
support financially to strangers.
To conclude
, although
the countryside
helps children
to become good humans, cities
make them more competitive for better growth opportunities through the best education
and healthcare facilities.Submitted by arshkaurbrar on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and flows logically. At times, the transition between city advantages and countryside benefits could be smoother.
task achievement
Avoid repetition of ideas. For example, the importance of education and healthcare in cities could be addressed more succinctly without repeating similar points.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You have successfully discussed both sides of the argument and provided a balanced viewpoint.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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