Some people say that older, more traditional buildings in cities should be preserved. Others believe that these buildings should be demolished and new ones built in their place. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
A number of
people
argue that ancient buildings
in towns should be protected, while
others are of the opinion that these buildings
should be replaced with new ones. This
essay agrees with the prior point and will show that, despite the risk of the collapse of traditional buildings
, they serve as cultural heritage
in most countries, whereas
constructing new mansions will facilitate modern life.
People
in most towns and cities
are in a fever of preserving their cultural heritage
at any cost, wherein governments fund a totally separate department in the government body to work and maintain these old monuments, such
as buildings
and protected traditional suburbs in a city; furthermore
, these buildings
are part of the city’s beauty, and it would be better to have them maintained every six months to keep them from falling off. For instance
, in our city, we have a row of buildings
that are from around 90 years ago, and the government carries out maintenance every year to keep them as they were built in their first years. In my opinion, as part of cultural heritage
, these buildings
and houses should be preserved and maintained for more years.
However
, there are a number of people
who prefer to get rid of these old buildings
and build new ones with modern facilities and safety standards. As of now, people
are interested in smart cities
with the best transportation, self-driven cars, smart buildings
with 6G internet connectivity, and more robust facilities such
as swimming pools, gyms, bars, garages for the safety of cars, nearby supermarkets, cinemas, and loads of amusement parks for their children. For example
, some cities
around the world are divided into two parts—new cities
and old cities
—to build new homes and mansions. I believe we should not diminish our old cities
because they are memories of our ancestors.
In conclusion, archaic buildings
are part of ancient heritage
, and most people
advocate their destruction. Conversely
, others prefer to demolish these buildings
and build new ones in place of them with more residential amenities, whereas
I believe they should be preserved for as long as their longevity could last
.Submitted by am.edrees on
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task achievement
While your essay covers both views and provides a clear opinion, it could benefit from further elaboration on the arguments for demolishing old buildings and examples. Expanding on why some people believe that modern amenities are more crucial could strengthen your task response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your points flow logically from one to the next. While your essay generally follows a logical structure, some transitions could be clearer to enhance coherence.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples that effectively illustrate your points, such as the maintenance of old buildings in your city.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear and well-developed introduction and conclusion, which appropriately encapsulate your argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?