Many children today are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons for this problem and give solutions to fix this problem.
The world had drastically changed from the past. Today many
childeren
are extremely overweight. Correct your spelling
children
This
is very unhealthy and can lead ro
problems. Correct your spelling
to
This
essay will explain reasons
for Correct article usage
the reasons
this
and give solution
to fix the problem.
There are numerous reasons why Correct article usage
a solution
children
nowadays are becoming overweight. First,
fast food restaurants have a major impact on this
problem. Many families are
rely on fast food as their main source of meals for their Unnecessary verb
apply
children
. Second,
the lack of physical activity plays a major role. For example
, in Kuwait, many parents
do not trying
to encourage their Change the verb form
try
children
to exercise. Finally
, most kids
recently are addicted to their tablets. Due to
the rissing
of technology, the new generation of Correct your spelling
rising
kids
are using tablets all the time
and that makes them lazy and overweight.
However
, there are also
several solutions to this
issue. First,
families are supposed to cook for their childeren
. Correct your spelling
children
For instance
, parents
can cook healthy meals and it will be just as tasty as fast food. Second,
parents
have to encourage their kids
to do physical activities. Enrolling childeren
in mortal arts classes, Correct your spelling
children
such
as jujutsu classes, could be a great idea for their overall
health. Finally
, reducing the screen time
for kids
. Parents
should not let their children
to
be in front of the screen all the Change the verb form
apply
time
, and they have to put a time
limit for using the tablets.
In conclusion, it is clear to see that there are several reasons that explain why children
are overweight and unhealthy. It is also
easy to see that there are many available solutions to help this
problem.Submitted by alfred on
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General Advice
In a few spots, there are minor spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'ro' instead of 'to' and 'childeren' instead of 'children'. Paying attention to these details can help improve the readability of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
In the introduction, try to preview the main points you will discuss in the body paragraphs. This helps set clear expectations for the reader and strengthens the coherence of your essay.
Task Response
Provide more specific examples or statistics to support your points. This can add weight to your arguments and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or aspect of the problem and its solution. This will make your essay more structured and easier to follow.
Introduction and Conclusion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your arguments neatly.
Task Achievement
You have successfully identified multiple reasons for children being overweight and provided feasible solutions. This shows a good understanding of the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion
The transitions between ideas are smooth, which aids in the reader's comprehension of your arguments.
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