The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of

new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
The line graph illustrates the number of closed and
newly-opened
Correct your spelling
newly opened
show examples
outlets in one country from 2011 to 2018.
Overall
, both shop closures and openings fluctuated throughout the
period
.
Nonetheless
, the
period
between 2015 to 2018 saw a big difference in trend that happened
conversely
between shop closures and openings. Closed shops fluctuated wildly over the given
period
. It started at around 6,500 in 2011 and decreased to 6,000 in 2012 but increased moderately to around 7,100 in 2013.
Nonetheless
, it dropped significantly to almost 700 in 2015 but recovered drastically to approximately 5,100 in 2016 and continued to moderately fluctuate. Stall openings
also
fluctuated radically throughout the
period
. It dropped significantly from approximately 8,500 in 2011 to 4,000 in 2012 but increased drastically to 6,000 in 2014. The number
then
dropped again to 4,000 in 2015 but after a steady
period
between 2015 to 2017, it dipped to 3,000 by 2018.
Submitted by aribawadzaki on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "nonetheless".
Vocabulary: Replace the words period with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "moderately" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • decline
  • surge
  • stabilize
  • correlation
  • economic conditions
  • consumer behavior
  • technological advancements
  • urban development
  • employment
  • retail sector
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