IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

As computers translate quickly and accurately, some people think that learning foreign languages is a waste of time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#computers #people #languages #waste #time
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It is argued that learning
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
language
 is
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a wastage
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wastage
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waste
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 of time because nowadays
computers
 can quickly and accurately translate anything at
anytime
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any time
show examples
. In my opinion,
its
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it's
it is
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 true that
computers
 can translate anything, but learning
foreign
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a foreign
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language
 is
also
 important and I will support my opinion in
this
 essay. In today's world, we have noticed
advancement
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advancements
show examples
 in science and technology and
computer
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the computer
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 is the most prominent example in
this
 regard. Emerging of new apps and websites in it, have made things easier for people.
For
instance
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instance,
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Grammerly
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Grammarly
 is a website and app, that
help
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helps
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 people in solving
grammer
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grammar
 errors and predicts vocabulary as well.
However
, there are certain apps that translate other languages, which is a huge help in solving
language
 barriers. Commencing the other idea, it is
also
assuamed
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assumed
 that one should not acquire
foreign
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a foreign
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language
, as it is
useless
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a useless
the useless
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act
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to act
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 to them.
This
 kind of narrative is completely false and silly. As, mastering the
language
 of the
addopted
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adopted
 country, is
need
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needs
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of
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apply
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time. One can not always take
computers
 with themselves in public. So,
its
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it's
it is
show examples
 mandatory for
individual
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individuals
show examples
 to learn and adopt
other's
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other
show examples
language
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languages
show examples
 for different purposes, like, communicating with natives, job interviews, different tests and exams etc.
Therefore
, learning cross-border languages
are
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is
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considere
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considered
 key to the door of survival in different states.
Hence
, it is proven from the above arguments,
although
Correct word choice
that although
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computers
 can translate
language
 for people
but
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apply
show examples
still they have to learn
new
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a new
show examples
language
for
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apply
show examples
the
survival
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survive
show examples
 in
new
Add an article
the new
a new
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 state.
Submitted by hadiyanasir73 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to another. Currently, some sentences and ideas appear disjointed and could benefit from clearer linkage phrases and more logical flow.
task achievement
For a higher task achievement score, provide more relevant specific examples and elaborate on them. The example of Grammarly is good, but it would strengthen your essay to include more varied and concrete examples to support your points.
task achievement
Be careful with language use, spelling, and grammar. Phrases like “wastage of time”, “assuamed”, “addopted” and “Grammerly” could undermine the overall clarity and professionalism of your writing. It might be useful to spend a bit more time on proofreading.
coherence cohesion
Address the use of discourse markers and complex sentence structures for better readability. Varying sentence length and starting sentences differently can improve the overall readability and engagement of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear and sets up the topic well, presenting your standpoint early on, which is critical for clarity and task achievement.
complete response
You provide a balanced view, recognizing the benefits of both computers and learning foreign languages, which demonstrates a deep understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Machine translation
  • Nuance
  • Bilingualism
  • Cognitive development
  • Global job market
  • Cross-cultural
  • Technological dependence
  • Language proficiency
  • Cultural identity
  • Authentic interactions
  • National security
  • Linguistic subtleties
  • Cultural references
  • Emotional undertones
  • Cognitive exercise
  • Mental agility
  • Travel experiences
  • Accuracy in translation
What to do next:
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