IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #summarise #features #comparisons
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the graph below shows
that
Correct word choice
apply
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the
percetages
Correct your spelling
percentage
percentages
 of
fours
Fix the agreement mistake
four
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west
Replace the word
Western
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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 between 1970 to 2020, with
guest
Fix the agreement mistake
guests
show examples
 from 2030 to 2040
Firstly
Linking Words
,the most of
population
Use synonyms
 are
Use synonyms
philippines
Change the capitalization
Philippines
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on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1970 ,
in addition
Linking Words
 ,the lower of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
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 is ındonessia ,
on the other hand
Linking Words
 ,
the
Change preposition
at the
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 starting
1980's
Change noun form
1980s
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,
Use synonyms
malaysia
Change the capitalization
Malaysia
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 of
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
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are increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
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 than
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three countries and
come
Wrong verb form
came
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fisrt
Correct your spelling
first
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2040 .At the same time ,
while
Linking Words
Use synonyms
Change the capitalization
Malaysia
show examples
malaysia
Change the capitalization
Malaysia
show examples
 and ındonesia of cıtızens approximately three-times were
Correct your spelling
increased
incresed
Correct your spelling
increased
,
thailand
Change the capitalization
Thailand
show examples
 and
Use synonyms
Change the capitalization
Philippines
show examples
Correct article usage
the philippines
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philippines
Change the capitalization
Philippines
show examples
has
Verb problem
apply
show examples
doubled
Although
Linking Words
 the
Philippines
Use synonyms
 passed
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 in 1970 and 1990, the
Philippines
Use synonyms
 had the highest
population
Use synonyms
 in 2000,
while
Linking Words
 Indonesia passed Thailand in 2000 and
then
Linking Words
 surpassed the
Philippines
Use synonyms
 in 2010 to become the second. In short, the graph below shows the
population
Use synonyms
 of four countries,
while
Linking Words
 the highest
population
Use synonyms
 was in the
Philippines
Use synonyms
 in 1970, the highest
population
Use synonyms
 was in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 in 2040.
Submitted by tugay9619 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, philippines, malaysia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urban population
  • Trend analysis
  • Urbanization rate
  • Economic development
  • Rural-urban migration
  • Infrastructure
  • Socio-economic events
  • Stagnation
  • Anomalies
  • Environmental concerns
  • Predictive analysis
  • Geographical aspects
  • Government policies
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