The bar chart gives the top eight online activitiies in slovakia in a given month.

The bar chart gives the top eight online activitiies in slovakia in a given month.
The graph shows the eight top online activities in Slovakia in the
mention
Change the verb form
mentioned
show examples
month.
Overall
, there are eight online activities used by
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and women, but women
use
the most. percentage in all of them. The three most
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
are
Email
, texting or
instant
messages and social networking.
Following
this
, the most
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
for men are
email
,
instant
messaging and internet banking. The rest of
then
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
like streaming, job hunting, health research and online education
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
the least
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
by both genders. Women are the biggest users
on using
Verb problem
of
show examples
email
with over 80 per
cent
, and the second one was
instant
messaging with less than 90 per
cent
.
Following
this
, the third one is social networking and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
with less than 80 per
cent
.
After
this
, streaming and health research with less than 60 per
cent
. The least
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
is job hunting
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and online education with less than 30 per
cent
. Men are the second most users
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
email
and
instant
messaging with less than 90 per
cent
.
After
this
, internet banking and social networking, and the third place is with health research and streaming with less than 60 per
cent
.
Finally
, the least used by men is online education with over 20 per
cent
.
Submitted by cuevas14dic on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "after this, following this".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words use, email, instant, cent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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