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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that in the future, environmental problems will mean that we are unable to live on this planet. In order to survive, the human species will need to find another planet that can support life.

#people #future #planet #species #support #life
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Due to
 environmental problems, some people think that we will be unable to live on our
planet
. If humankind would like to survive, we will need to look for another
planet
 where we can thrive I completely agree with the above statement. In my opinion, our beloved
planet
 is unfortunately at a no-return point.
Firstly
, overpopulation and climate change are some of the issues that are strongly related to the environmental challenge. The overpopulation issue
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is not just about the need for space for living, it
also
 brings problems
such
 as food necessity or waste management. In order to feed the world's population, a lot of forests
such
 as the Amazon rainforest are being destroyed. The trees are being cut to use the area for cattle or for the palm tree industry.
Moreover
, climate change is a reality, the sea level water has been increasing in the North and South Pole. In different documentaries, is talked about how the land is less productive
due to
 the lack of rain or because of
over exploitation
Add a hyphen
over-exploitation
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.
Thus
, the temperature has risen in the oceans and some animals are close to extinction.
However
, some people could argue that the governments are trying to resolve all of the problems mentioned by new and stronger environmental laws.
For example
, in cities like London or Madrid
the
Correct article usage
apply
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fuel cars cannot drive through the city centre. The use of electric cars is being promoted and there are stronger laws regarding recycling. Nowadays, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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 more news
in
Change preposition
on
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 TV or radio about the scientific community and how
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 similar
planet
similar
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
has been found.
Therefore
this
 could make us think that they are aware that our
planet
 is not going to survive despite all the new environmental regulations. In conclusion, our
planet
 is damaged to
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 extent that it is not recuperable, despite all the effort that every government has given, so, the race to find a new
planet
 has already started.
Submitted by alextf85 on

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task achievement
Try incorporating more specific examples and facts into your arguments to provide stronger support for your points.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transitions between paragraphs to enhance the overall flow and coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making the overall structure easy to follow.
task achievement
Your response addresses the task effectively and provides a complete answer to the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental degradation
  • sustainable development
  • renewable energy
  • carbon footprint
  • biodiversity loss
  • climate change
  • greenhouse gases
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • habitable planets
  • space colonization
  • terraforming
  • ethical dilemmas
  • resource allocation
  • technological advancements
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