Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that
products
high in sugar
should be sold at a higher price
to discourage people from consuming excessive sugar
due to
many medical issues caused by high levels of sugar
in food and beverage goods. I strongly agree with this
idea because, through this
policy, many people will be more thoughtful with their buying and companies
will start selling healthier products
.
More expensive sugary products
will result in a more thoughtful consumer. By implementing this
strategy, a consumer will be most likely to think thoroughly before spending more money on a product that contains excessive sugar
. The money that is
not spent then
can be allocated to buy more nutritious products
, leading to a healthier individual. For example
, recent research found that after an increase in the price
of goods that are high in sugar
, there is an increase in fruit sales in many countries.
Moreover
, the higher price
of sweet foods and drinks can push companies
to start offering more well-nourished products
. The financial cost of a decrease in sales will prompt companies
to develop better alternatives that the market needs. If more people choose to stop buying sugar
-excessive products
, companies
then
must turn to healthier products
in order to keep making profits. For instance
, after the sugar
tax was implemented in Singapore, a lot of companies
starts
to make healthier goods.
In conclusion, since Wrong verb form
started
sugar
-excessive products
cause a lot of diseases, it is thought that the price
of products
high in sugar
should be higher. I agree with this
suggestion because more expensive sweet products
will result in more careful customers and healthier products
in the market.Submitted by aribawadzaki on
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task achievement
The essay effectively addresses the task, providing clear arguments and relevant examples to support the position. To further improve, you could deepen the analysis or add a counterargument for a well-rounded discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, ensure seamless transitions between ideas to enhance coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure with well-organized paragraphs.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Both an introduction and a conclusion are present and clearly encapsulate the main argument.