Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that ıt ıs better to try and improve such situations

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #ıt #ıs #situations

Some individuals argue that it is the best way to embrace negative circumstances like deficiency of money and job dissatisfaction.

In contrast

, other

people

believe that

endeavoring

Change the spelling

endeavouring

show examples

for the betterment of unsuitable

situations

is the best approach. On the one hand, whenever

people

accept their

situations

they do not struggle with difficulties and can get away from these

situations

all. They,

hence

, have healthier lives, and they do not experience a high amount of stress and pressure.

For instance

, if the educational situation acceptance

occur

Change the verb form

occurs

show examples

, student do not care about the result of exams, and they unwind all of their time. So, advocates of

this

idea refer to the mind's health as a prime reason for their claims.

On the other hand

, from other

people

's standpoints,

people

should make an effort for whatever they have tendencies for, and they prefer the development of circumstances rather than

acception

Correct your spelling

accepting

of them.

In addition

, they think

people

who modify unsuitable

situations

pursue a high level of happiness. They believe

although

people

may encounter some difficulties in

this

way, they will be satisfied with their performance after finishing

this

task. From these

people

's viewpoints, not only does acceptance lead to unwinding, but it

also

can cause depression.

Thus

, regarding the mentioned reason,

people

must do their best for the alteration of

situations

Overall

, similar to the other issues, both sides of

this

issue have benefits and downsides, and

people

must consider both sides of it for their selection. In my opinion, irrespective of the above-mentioned advantages of

this

issue, life without changing and

effort

Correct article usage

the effort

show examples

for changing is meaningless.

Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on Sat Sep 28 2024

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task response

To improve your score, work on developing your main points more thoroughly. Use more detailed examples and explanations to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and use clearer topic sentences. This will help improve the logical structure of your essay and make it easier to follow.

task response

Your essay presents both sides of the argument clearly and maintains a balanced perspective throughout.

coherence cohesion

You have a good introduction and a strong conclusion that summarizes your stance effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that ıt ıs better to try and improve such situations

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that teachers are no longer needed because students can study via the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

Some people get into debt by buying things they don't need and can'f afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

The world is experiencing dramatic in population,which is causing problems not only for developing countries but also for developed nations Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes and suggest at least one possible solution.