Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #technology

this

contemporary era, many citizens believe that the evolution of

technology

has made their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

flexible

while

shopping

while

other

people

contradict

this

opinion. In

this

essay, I will discuss both of the perceptions and give my own kind of thoughts.

To begin

with, it is widely believed that the evolution of technologies has impacted positive signs in Customer's lives

while

shopping.

This

is to say that,

due to

the advancement of technologies

people

can purchase any kind of good from online platforms using their smartphones.

Similarly

people

can save time if they do shopping from online sites.

For instance

, if

people

use

technology

while

shopping they can easily find the products through application as they do not require to visit the shop physically.

Therefore

, it helps the masses to save time and gives quick access to the products.

On the other hand

, it has

also

been seen as a negative trend in some communities.

This

due to

unreliable sources and over-dependency.

While

people

shop online there are some possibilities of getting fraud as the majority of online platforms are not verified and are less reliable.

Therefore

this

might result in

people

not meeting the expectations and access to the product. Meanwhile, if

people

are heavily dependent upon

technology

the habit of

people

will be lazy and there will be less physical involvement of citizens in the physical markets.

To conclude

, the life of humans will be flexible

due to

the development of modern shopping. It is

also

true that

due to

evolving of modern

technology

individuals will be heavily dependent on it. In my opinion, I firmly believe that the development of

technology

has impacted

people

's lives in a more positive way than negative.

Submitted by cranjal07 on Mon Sep 30 2024

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Task Response

You have addressed both sides of the argument and provided your own opinion, which fulfills the task requirements. However, try to include more specific examples to better support your points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay is generally well-organized and the ideas flow logically, but work on varying your sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. Additionally, some sentences could be clearer with minor revisions.

Introduction and Conclusion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your argument effectively.

Supported Main Points

The main points in each paragraph are relevant and well-supported, which demonstrates your understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

online marketplaces
mobile payment options
personalized advertising
accessibility
compare prices
decision fatigue
impulse buying
financial imprudence
privacy and data security
transformed
streamlined
user-friendly

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Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing sof skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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