You are a member of an International Students' club. The club is organising an event to celebrate popular food from around the world. Write a letter to the event organiser, Luis. In your letter • offer to make a popular dish from your country • describe what this dish is • explain why it should be included in the event

#member #students #club #event #food #world #organiser #luis #offer #dish #country

Dear Mr Luis, I am Jacob, a member of the Richard Global Pupil Club, Brisbane with registration number 201536. I am writing to show my willingness to include my protein mango cake

dish

into

Change preposition

show examples

the upcoming event based on popular foods of numerous nations. As you are the organiser of the event, I would like to participate in baking a protein-added mango cake. Primarily, it is one of the most popular dishes in my nation and particularly most of the bodybuilders and fitness trainers suggest it to their trainees. I can prepare

this

within 30 minutes for more than 20 people.

This

dish

contains ingredients like Alphonso mango, which is known as the king of fruits, Muscletech iso protein 3000 and some natural sweeteners.

Moreover

this

cake will surprise everyone as no other

dish

can beat it in its crunchy taste and the inner layers of dry fruits will leave a long-lasting impact on people. I think

this

dish

can be presented at

this

event as it is a cost-effective traditionally cooker-based Indian

dish

which anyone can prepare at home.

Additionally

, I am the only candidate to represent my country so it will be a great opportunity for me if you allow me to serve my

dish

. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Jacob Brown

Submitted by Mrjit147 on Mon Sep 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

To strengthen coherence, consider using more transitional words or phrases to link ideas seamlessly.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea more explicitly. This will help in maintaining clarity and coherence.

task achievement

The letter effectively addresses all the bullet points in the task and provides a detailed response.

task achievement

The tone of the letter is appropriate and polite, which suits the formal nature of the task.

coherence cohesion

The greeting and closing are correctly formatted and add a professional touch to the letter.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

219 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Enthusiastic
Contribution
Cuisine
Traditional
Ingredients
Preparation
Cultural significance
Celebrate
Diversity
Culinary traditions
National dish
Occasion
Unique attributes
Preparation method
Gourmet
Authentic
Flavorful
Recipe
Event arrangements
Showcase

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