Many jobs used to be done by hand, but nowadays an increasing number of them are done using machines instead. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this development.

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With the advancement of science and
technology
and
development
Correct article usage
the development
show examples
of automation
technology
,many tasks that used to be done manually are now performed by
machines
and automated systems.
This
change brings many advantages and disadvantages.The advantages are increased
effciency
Correct your spelling
efficiency
and productivity.
For example
,
machines
are able to complete repetitive and standardized tasks faster faster than humans,which makes the production process more efficient.The disadvantage is the unemployment problem.With the promotion of automation,many traditional jobs may disappear,resulting in a large number of people losing their jobs.Low-skilled workers
in particular
are at greater risk of unemployment as their jobs are more easily replaced by
machines
.Second the risk of relying on
technology
.Over-reliance on
machines
and automation
technology
may lead to major problems in
event
Correct article usage
the event
show examples
of system failure or
cyber attack
Add a hyphen
cyber-attack
show examples
.The challenge ahead will be how to balance technological advances with the demands of human work and ensure that all segments of society benefit equally from these changes.
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task achievement
Try to expand on the examples provided to emphasize their relevance and to better support your arguments.
coherence
Ensure that there is no repetition in ideas, like the double mention of increased speed, to maintain clarity and conciseness.
cohesion
It might help to conclude the essay with a strong summarizing statement that reiterates the main points discussed.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and linked to the topic, providing a logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Main points related to efficiency, unemployment, and technological reliance are well integrated into the discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Efficiency
  • Productivity
  • Economic growth
  • Mass production
  • Standardization
  • Job displacement
  • Skill obsolescence
  • Overreliance
  • Income inequality
  • Social mobility
  • Technological advancements
  • Manual labor
  • Continuous learning
  • Skill development
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