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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.
The table illustrates the three different sources of police
budget
Use synonyms
 in 2017 and 2018 and the table compares the three areas that the
money
Use synonyms
 is distributed to.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
budget
Use synonyms
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 slightly in 2018, most of which
comes
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
 from the national government and the the least amount of
money
Use synonyms
comes
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
 from other resources. The proportion of salaries for staff accounts
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 most
although
Linking Words
 it declines gradually
in contrast
Linking Words
 to technology with a small rise. Starting with the table, the total amount of
Use synonyms
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
show examples
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 slightly from just above 300
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
euro
Fix the agreement mistake
euros
show examples
 in 2007 to about 318
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
euro
Fix the agreement mistake
euros
show examples
 in 2018.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, all the sources fund more
money
Use synonyms
 in 2018 than in 2017 with the national
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 distributing the most
money
Use synonyms
 with about 177
million
Use synonyms
euro
Use synonyms
, followed by local taxes with around 102
million
Use synonyms
euro
Use synonyms
.
Nevertherless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
, the least amount of
money
Use synonyms
 is
founded
Verb problem
found
show examples
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other resources with over 38
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
euro
Fix the agreement mistake
euros
show examples
 in 2018. Turning to the pie chart, the largest rate of
budget
Use synonyms
 goes to salaries for staff and officers with 75% in 2017 and 69% in 2018. As it
experieces
Correct your spelling
experiences
experienced
 a small drop in 2018, the proportion of
money
Use synonyms
 distributed to technology
rises
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 dramatically from 8% to 14 % respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the rates of
money
Use synonyms
 for buildings and transport remain steady at 17% in both years, making it the second most dominant area of the three.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, money, million, euro with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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