many high level of positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than fifty percent female. compnies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Lately, a plethora of topics is being seriously talked about among individuals and groups, and one prominent topic is
gender
. There are even people who believe that the rate of important
positions
in companies should be more released for
women
while
others the percentage of females in the workforce already exceeds around 50%. If talent and
experience
are to be considered, the high-level vacancies in hiring should put personal ability first
instead
of
gender
even though others think that
Women
aren't able to make clear decisions in projects. The first point I want to emphasise is personal talent. It is a common fact that important
positions
are required for professional skills. To illustrate, HR in a big
company
wants to hire a market manager in consideration should the interviewee
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
a sensitive instinct in fluctuating markets
instead
of
gender
, which is a pivot to survival in the competition of the market.
Therefore
, putting the right people in the correct
positions
without sex is gonna helping in enterprise development. Another idea worth stressing is that personal
experience
is necessary to help a
company
avoid making mistakes. The reason is that a
company
have profit or deficit, which is dependent on decision maker whether have
experience
or abilities to lead a
company
, not depending on their
gender
. In hospitality, to exemplify, a professional
experience
is going help to deal with the problems of customers.
Hence
, working
experience
is the first consideration in hiring people who are suitable for high-level
positions
.
On the other hand
, some individuals reckon that the number of
women
filling the figure of workforce market with over 50%. They claim that keeping a percentage of the high-level vacancies for females will be unfair in the existing environment.
For instance
, the merit of occupying an important office should be evaluated by personal ability and
experience
.
However
, one should bear in mind that development and advancement are necessary the talent and experiences from different aspects, not from
gender
. In conclusion, changing the
company
standard just to increase the chances of
women
getting high
positions
in a relevant place is not the solution to
this
question.
However
, I still hold the opinion that personal ability and
experience
are urgently needed for a
company
's development and advancement.
Submitted by rosolook on

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structure
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Support main points with relevant examples and fully develop your argument. This may involve offering counterpoints and then explaining why they are not as strong as your own position.
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cohesion
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clarity
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas that directly relate to the task. Ideas should be expressed in a way that makes them easily understood and should directly address the essay prompt.
relevance and specificity
Use specific examples that are directly relevant to your main points. Ensure that these examples are detailed and help to strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gender parity
  • Inclusive workforce
  • Corporate governance
  • Glass ceiling
  • Equal opportunity
  • Progressive policies
  • Workforce diversity
  • Merit-based promotion
  • Affirmative action
  • Empowerment
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