The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

#growth #shops #towns #cities

The growth of online shopping has significantly transformed the way

people

purchase goods and services.

While

it offers significant convenience and variety, I disagree that it will lead to the complete closure

off

Change preposition

show examples

all physical

shops

in town. Some argue that

this

trend could eventually lead to the closure of all physical

shops

in towns, but believe that online shopping will continue to

expant

Correct your spelling

expand

expect

, it is unlikely to completely replace traditional stores.

Firstly

, many

people

still value the experience of shopping in physical stores. For certain products,

such

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

clothing or furniture, customers prefer to see and try items before purchasing. The tactile experience and personal interaction with sales staff can not be fully replaced by online shopping.

Moreover

shops

often serve as social

space

Fix the agreement mistake

spaces

show examples

where

people

gather. It's

important

Add an article

an important

show examples

part of the community.

Secondly

, not everyone has access to the

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

comfortable

Add a missing verb

is comfortable

show examples

with online shopping. Online shopping provides benefits

such

as the

abillity

Correct your spelling

ability

to compare prices and the comfort of shopping from home. But older

people

in particular

, may prefer

shoping

Correct your spelling

shopping

in physical

store

Fix the agreement mistake

stores

show examples

. In some cases, it is more convenient to buy something locally than wait for delivery.

However

, it is true that

rise

Correct article usage

the rise

show examples

of online shopping has caused many smaller

shops

to struggle,

especialy

Correct your spelling

especially

the competitive pricing and convenience that online retailers offer. To survive, traditional

shops

will need to innovate,

focus

Correct word choice

and focus

show examples

on offering unique

experience

Fix the agreement mistake

experiences

show examples

, high-quality customer services, or exclusive products, that online platforms can not provide. In conclusion,

while

the growth of online shopping will

undoubdetlly

Correct your spelling

undoubtedly

impact traditional retail, it is unlikely to lead to the complete

dissapearence

Correct your spelling

disappearance

of physical stores. Both forms of shopping are likely to coexist, catering to different consumer preferences.

Submitted by helgavitalivna on Thu Oct 03 2024

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task achievement

To strengthen task achievement, provide more specific examples to illustrate the points discussed.

coherence and cohesion

Work on sentence structure and reduce repetitive phrases for improved clarity.

coherence and cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.

coherence and cohesion

Main points are logically structured, offering a coherent flow throughout the piece.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt with a generally complete response, discussing both the growth of online shopping and its impact on physical stores.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

e-commerce
brick-and-mortar
physical stores
online retailers
retail apocalypse
digital economy
consumer behavior
sustainability
commercial landscape
high-street
consumer trends
augmented reality
showrooms
carbon footprint

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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

These days, more and more people prefer to use shared transport such as buses, trams or carsharing applications on their smartphones rather than driving their own cars. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages

Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention, while others believe that it is the responsibility of each individual to protect themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The best way to solve traffic and transport problems is to encourage people to live in cities rather than in surburbs or countryside. What are the effects of rapid population growth in the city? How can the quality of life of city dwellers be maintained?

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public spaces. many people believe that such a ban is jusitified. Do you agree or disagree?